Hi, I found a small lump inside my vagina a short time ago and went to the GP. She said that she could see a lump on my cervix and we are not sure whether it's the same one I'm referrring to. I have been referred for colposcopy and am terrified. My colposcopy appointment was with a male doctor, but I have had to request a female one because I can't cope with the idea of a man being present when I'm vulnerable. The reason I've never had a smear test is because I've been sexually assaulted so many times I just can't stand the thought of anybody touching me - it makes me feel angry and defensive, but I don't have a choice anymore. This means that I have to wait another six days. I have two children and am terrified that I could have prevented this by having smears and I haven't been. The thought is making me feel sick.
Has anybody else been in this position? I have no idea what is going on in my cervix so no idea what to expect. I'm worried that they will actually diagnose cancer when I'm there. Would a colposcopist be able to tell me what these lumps are just from looking at them?
It sounds like you are having a rough time and you are in the right place to get advice. It is really hard waiting for an appointment to come around. We have all been there! They are really kind and caring people in the colposcopy clinic. You will be in safe hands. They might have some idea about what the lump/lumps are and tell you what the next steps are, if any. There is a chance that it is something innocent so try not to get yourself too wound up (easier said than done, I know). Try not to overthink it. You will be ok. Big hugs. Xx
I am so sorry you are dealing with this. I agree with rufus--too much reading and overthinking won't be helpful for this. Try not to jump to the worst case senario--the vagina is a wild body part with all sorts of ducts and cells that can clog and do all sorts of weird things. This may be something easy and innocent, and if by some chance it is not, cervical cancer is very treatable. I bet they will have some ideas of what they are looking at when you go to colposcopy, and good for you for demanding a female doctor. I don't have your background experiences, but I find male doctors don't generally listen well, so I often choose female doctors.
I will be sending you strength and best wishes for an easy procedure.
