First time here, im here because im going crazy with worry about my abnormal smear result.
I have mild dys and hpv virus but im not sure what strain of the virus.
Im waiting for my colposcopy appointment.
Im 42 and single. Ive recently become a Granny for the first time and life is SO good at the moment, i know i might seem dramatic but i keep almost crying thinking of my kids and my little granddaughter and how shit it would be to croak it now!!!!!
I keep telling myself it will be ok but my Gran died from cervical cancer and so did one of her sisters and its worrying the heart out of me.
Im under the hospital for ovarian cysts and they keep a close eye on me, blood tests for C and scans. But i didnt go last year for a scan or blood test. Stupidly kept putting it off!
I know theres nothing any of you can say to make me stop worrying but i havent got anyone to talk too. My mums recently been diagnosed with MS and shes having such a tough time i do not want to worry her with this. My daughter doesnt need to know anything.
I have told a friend over the phone and i am seeing her for a cuddle tomorrow but because having a bad result is quite common i feel like no one understands MY worry.
I'd never even heared of HPV before the letter and im gutted that ive got that, it seems a bit of a stigma to me, im ashamed to tell my Mum, thats for sure. Its a std , how can i tell my Mum that!!!!!!!!
It would be kind of nice to be able to get things off my chest here :)