All my searches on google lately have brought me to Jo’s Trust so thought I would join and share my fears instead of googling!
Back in 2011, I received a mildly abnormal smear result, nothing much happened other than it scaring me and I went back after six months and all was fine.
Fast forward a few years and my most recent smear was earlier in the Summer, admittedly a year later than it should have been, but life just got in the way - needless to say I won’t let life get in the way again.
I came home from work on Thursday evening and had two letters, the first letter I opened was an appointment for a colposcopy on Thursday this week. I was distraught, shocked and scared. The second letter said that my smear had shown severe dyskaryosis.
I have been stressing ever since and can’t think of anything else. I’m really very frightened about going on Thursday, about what might happen. I’m basically petrified.
I lost my older brother, two years ago and he was 29. Now I’m 29 and am worried that maybe I’ll die when I’m 29 too. I’ve got children and an amazing partner and the thought of not being with them fills me with fear.
In all honesty, the reason I finally went for my smear was because I was suffering with pain during sex. More recently, my partner has mentioned that it just doesn’t feel the same anymore and that’s scaring me even more but of course, he’s just a man and doesn’t think before he speaks.
I feel like I’m spinning at the moment and I don’t know where I’m going to end up. All I know right now is that in absolutely terrified xx
Hi Hun, so sorry to hear you lost your brother at such a young age.
I just wanted to share my story with you. I have had 2 normal smears and my third i received the same results as you. Severe dyskariosis. The world severe just dreaded me with absolute fear. Thinking that at some point in the near future would be left without a mummy and husband without a wife. I don't think I over reacted really, it's only normal to be scared. Anyway had my results and colooscopy appointment through at the same time with the colposcopy only being in 6 days time. I had the colposcopy and the abnormal cells showed up after putting a brown dye on the cervix. They decided to do lletz treatment there and then to remove. This was then sent off to be tested. That wait inbetween the lletz and receiving my results was quite possible the hardest wait I've ever experienced.
My results came back as cin3 with all cells being removed on that daY. No signs of the dreaded C word. I now have to go back every 6 months for follow up smears.
I wish you all the best, please don't be afraid to ask for any advice on here or rant went you need to. We are all going though or have been through similar experiences. It's helped me so much the past 4 months xx
Thank you very much for your kind words. Just a waiting game now, Thursday can't come quickly enough!! Xxx
I'm also new here and had exactly the same, received the letter with appointment on and the day after received the smear results showing severe dyskaryosis. I'm so worried, I have been really stupid and haven't had a smear in a very long time, 12 years to be exact. I too will never miss a smear test again. I have never felt so worried in my life. I have my colposcopy on Tuesday and am extremely nervous about it.