Hi all!
Not posted in a while as generally been feeling well, although do pop on to keep updated…
Last two days I’ve been feeling a bit rotten, have bad lower back pain and feel in trying myself in knots as it was one of the main symptoms prior to my diagnosis (almost a year ago) I had the all clear in October and my last check up in mid Dec was all fine too so trying to keep calm that it’s not actually back…just seem to be struggling with the demons in my head bringing me down! My bowels are literally all over the place since treatment, some weeks I can’t get off loo, others I’m constipated. I’m hoping the back pain is coming from feeling a big clogged up, and not anything more sinister.
I guess I just needed to vent my worries and almost ask… Is this normal? Will I freak at the smallest of symptoms and fear that the wee c is back?? (I say wee c as it’s not bigger than me- I’ve defeated it!) I don’t want to pester my doctor continually, but also know that sometimes I mite have to, just even for peace of mind…
Xx
Ps it’s been fab to log on and see so many positive results posts!!!
Hi lt, I think how you're feeling is normal, I know I certainly am alot more aware of any changes and it's easy to panic and let your mind run away with you. I think it's fine to go to the doctors with any concerns and hopefully they can reassure you. I did develop pretty severe health anxiety after I was diagnosed and was completely consumed by it so I went to see a councillor which helped and also took a short course of antidepressants just to take the edge off, it does get easier as time goes on x
Hi LT The fear can be debilitating. I had it for so long that in the end I exhausted my self and didn't have any more energy to worry. I'm fine now. I do this little thing where I think the worse case scenario, plan my funeral, organise my affairs, grieve for my family and then anything up from there is a bonus. I'm NED so you can imagine how wonderful I feel - every day is a joy, new interests new enjoyments. I had to go rockbottom first. My life is better now than before diagnosis. Jayne
Hey, back pain is something I related to with the cancer treatment I had a bad back before but it became really painful after treatment and would cripple me - I'm lucky that my back pain now has gone - completely! I think it's because my body has finally started to recover and I've started to become stronger too and I've found my laughter is coming back and slowly but surely I'm becoming the person I was before - the depression is still crippling me but I'm becoming me again! I am 2years in November post treatment so it does take a while and do you know what I don't give cancer a second thought! I don't think about it and I don't worry about it either - I know my body and if I get anything that's to worry about I know it'll be checked out straight away (my doctor has assured me) so I'm getting on with my life -it's taken a lot for me to get here trust me but thinking to myself that if it still worrys me in a weeks time I'll get it checked out and when I had back and hip pain I did and I had a scan and an X-ray and both showed up clear and I have regular blood tests so I don't worry.
speak to your doctor if you need but it is vastly normal for pre treatment and going through it all xx
Hi LT :-)
Oh we all get the terrors! It is so normal you'd be unwell not to have them! You should find it eases off a bit once you've got two years worth of all clears under your belt :-)
Be lucky :-)
Tivoli
