Unhealthy lifestyle

Hi all. 

I seem to have got myself into a horrible cycle and I just feel like I'm the only one plus feel terribly guilty about it.

Basically I try all week to live reasonably healthily but when it comes to the weekend it all goes out the window and I start drinking (quite a lot), smoking and staying up late. Every week I think I'm going to change my ways but by Friday I'm drinking again. 

As I've had cancer and recurring issues with CIN3 and VIN3, I know I should be taking better of myself but for some reason I just don't. I then worry myself sick that I'm going to die.

Just wondering if anyone else struggles like this?  

Thanks 

I think we all do things we know we shouldn't and then feel really guilty. 

Can't give you any advice but, yes, I think I could be healthier but I do love my chocolate 

Hi Gouch, I thought yours was a very interesting post and very honest. I'm sure that many of us when we are in the throws of cancer treatment, swear to lead healthier life styles, exercise more, eat more healthily etc etc etc and then it gradually goes out of the window. I gave up drink and smoking over ten years ago now, so that's not my particular issue, but it took a long time to get there. Rather than using up a load of energy feeling guilty and anxious, have you ever considered some counselling sessions to help you understand why you might need to do this, or to help you make a plan of action for tackling it? Making changes can be very tough on your own and it helps so much if you have support to do this, whatever form it takes. As they say recognising the problem is half the battle. Good luck with tackling this. You have made a great start by sharing this with others here. X

I know what you mean. I feel so guilty letting my 'new standards' slip. I can feel myself relaxing and even just eating more unhealthily makes me feel bad but I have done it then I swear i will try again the next week. I wouldn't say alcohol or smoking have caused me issues. However I do find that socially some friends don't seem to understand why I drink less now and it's hard not to start a cc chat but I don't want to put people on a downer. it can be difficult on your own, is there someone you know you could try and make some health goals with even someone who is on a bit of a health kick? Best of luck but don't beat yourself up about it too much x 

This resonates with me. After cc you almost want a rule book to live by, 'do this, don't do this' etc. After surgery and at my first check up appointments i always asked, 'what can i do?', 'is there anything i should stop doing etc?' and the answer is always the same ' live a healty lifestyle'.

I expected to go on some insane health kick, but in reality just went back to work and continued my life pretty much as i had done before. I do go through phases sometimes when I think I drink too much, and i feel tired and irritable. When i notice this i try to pull it back, not go for as many drinks with colleagues etc.

I did raise this in a counselling session once and got some quite helpful advice, which was to decide what was acceptable for me and create my own guidelines. Could be a simple as ' don't drink more than 14 units of alcohol per week' or ' get out and about for a walk each day' or ' say no without explanation or feeling guilty'.

I haven't quite worked out what my own guidelines are yet, but they are becoming clearer.

Don't beat yourself up about it, and good luck ! x