Scared...awaiting results

I’m so scared. I’ve been through a journey with cervical cancer since I was diagnosed last October. I had 2 operations within 10 days. First operation to remove my lymph nodes, then an operation to remove the cancer from my cervix and then found out after the operation there was more and it progressed from stage 1b1 to stage 3. Went through 6 weeks of chemo and radiotherapy and 3 internal HDR surgeries.

I no longer can have children and currently going through an early induced menopause. I’ve had an MRI scan and having a CT scan next week and then to get the results mid May.

I’m so scared. I’m not sleeping at night as I’m now going through my mind everything that has gone on and having flash backs to the time I was in hospital.
I’m still in pain at times and my body just aches. I’m so worried, but trying desperately to put a brave face on as my mum currently too has breast cancer and is now going through her treatment.

Michelle: I'm so sorry for what you're going through.  You've been really brave and strong for the last six months and it's no wonder you're feeling stressed and tired.  Waiting is so hard.  I hope everything works out for you and your mum.  

xx

Oh bless you Michelle!

I know only too well how scary the run-up to tests can be, especially the first tests after a heap of treatment. You have indeed had a heap of treatment and I can only say that most likely, it has worked and you are now cancer-free. I know it's not possible to think about anything else, especially lying awake at night. But just as the night hours pass by and dawn breaks, so will the days between now and mid-May. All I can say is that you can count down the days and you will reach the day when the future day you are dreading becomes today, and then it will be in the past, and hopefully the news will be good and you will be smiling happily :-)

(((((HUGS)))))

Be lucky :-)
Tivoli

Oh what an incredibly stressful time for you, I am sending you lots of love. It must be so hard with your mum also receiving treatment - my mum was in remission from breast cancer when I was diagnosed and it felt like such a cruel blow to the family. 

I hope you have someone, a friend or partner, who you don't have to put a brave face on with - because sometimes it helps to let it all out and be needy for a little while, even if you do put the brave face on straight afterwards.

Night time is the worst, as your mind wanders into all sorts of negative places. I can only say, stay positive, but I know that isn't much use.

I hope you get the results ASAP. Take care of yourself xx

I can 100% understand what you are going through.  You've been through such a journey  and hopefully we are both about to receive some good news. I have my mri scan tomorrow and I have been stressing about it for about 2 weeks.  It's like I've had a couple of months honeymoon after my treatment and now reality is coming back.  

What sort of pains are you having?  I find that the muscles in my things are tight but I don't know if that's from the treatment or because I'm not as active as usual.  I've also got bloating problems - not too bad but uncomfortable. 

I'm doing as tivoli says and counting down the days  - 1 more sleep to my mri and 8 more sleeps till the results.  The day after my results I'm driving to Nottingham to collect my daughter from uni for the summer and hopefully it'll be a celebration. Oh and my results are on my mum's birthday so I'm hoping to give her a good birthday present.  I've not told anyone ,- only my husband because I don't want anyone else stressing. 

Let's see what happens x