is it just me...

Hi all, can I firstly say how pleased I am to have stumbled upon this website and forum. The information provided and hearing the stories of others has been fantastic and its reassuring to know Im not the only one going through this.

I am now 2 weeks 2 days post lletz for CIN2/3 and I think I am healing well physically (hideous infection 4 days post treatment excluded!) but emotionally, its been something of a roller coaster! I had my smear test in January, biopsy at colposcopy clinic in March and my lletz treatment in April. I have felt every emotion imaginable and I don’t know if its just me, but I have found that I have started responding with ‘I’m fine’! to the few people I have told about my procedure (husband aside who i have to say has been amazing). I’m worried that people will feel that because its ‘not cancer’ there is nothing to be upset about but some days I have felt quite down and worried. How have other people found the emotional side of things? is it normal to feel so confused and worried and at times, quite frustrated by the whole process, or I am just being a drama queen?

I also think I may have got my period yesterday but its early and i’m not sure because of the healing process, but maybe this would explain the raging emotions this week?! Roll on when this is over. Just the results to wait for now…


Hi marydoll25

I can completely relate to how you are feeling. Ive never been so emotional/anxious/worried/upset in all my life since dealing with this new situation. Im currently waiting on results from colposcopy which was an ordeal in itself. Ive never had to go through anything like this before and it sure makes you think about life and how much you want to be alive. I honestly dont know if i will ever be the same again after going through this although i am hoping i will. I recently found out my friend now suffers from serious health anxiety since she had an abnormal smear result which ended up needing further treatment. She is ok now but it just goes to show the power of emotions. 

What you are feeling is very normal. Xx

I'm sorry to hear your having a rubbish time of it too. I think it's just such an intimate procedure and connected to very scary potential outcomes. No wonder we are all worried sick. I'm hoping to get my rests soon, the waiting is awful! I hope you get a good resultime too and thank you for the reassurance! X x

Totally agree. For me it's been ups and downs (mostly me worrying my head off, checking any ailment I bet against the symptoms for cervical cancer!). After I had my LETTZ and was told that my biopsy results severely differed from my smear, it blew my mind. A few days later I had chance to actually sit down and think about it, and could barely move. I cried and cried, didn't want to eat, speak, get dressed or anything. That was my major wobble day. Since then, still awaiting my results, I've tried to keep positive and be brave but it is constantly on my mind. And I think from reading others posts on here, that seems to be the same for most. 

You're not alone, even though sometimes it feels like you are xx

Thank you for the reassurance crawley, I hope its helped you to read this thread and similar posts too, it definitley helps to make you feel less isolated this forum! Still waiting for results which is a killer but i do feel a bit more settled in myself just now. Hope your doing okay x