Hi ladies.
Feeling abit down today so just felt the need to jump on here.
My chemorafs start 6 Feb. I am stage 2 on the vaginal vault which is treated the same way as cc.
I was diagnosed on 7 Dec and my PET scan was clear for spread. I’ve had my planning scan and I’m just waiting now.
I am doing my best to try and stay positive and busy on the lead up to my treatment but it was my little girls 9th birthday today and I’m afraid it all got a bit much for me.
I have spent the day wanting her close to me for fear of what the future holds.
I don’t want to feel like this but sometimes it just takes over. I love her so much.
Sorry.x
Hi fire
we all have moments and days where we feel we need to be close to the ones who mean the most. You have had a lot of stress and it's not over so this is perfectly normal. I'm sure you can know logically why you are feeling this way but it still doesn't make it easier to get through it. Take comfort in knowing we all understand.
The great news is soon you will start your treatment and that will make you feel like you are doing something to secure your future. The start of treatment is scary but it is also a step towards feeling better.
Cuddle,enjoy and hold her tight. We don't need an excuse to have this towards are children. Soon the ball will be in motion and this idle period of waiting will be long forgotten.
Sending you a virtual hug. We are all here for you!
Thank you so much Lolli.
I've had a big glass of wine now and am feeling a little easier. I know it's normal to feel this way but it hurts so much.
A big hug for you Lolli and all your support.xx
Hi Fire 
Scary times and a big step ahead but you'll soon be getting on with it. You will fall easily into your new routine and it will all be over before you know it. The treatment is much kinder to you than it is to the cancer and I have no doubt whatsoever that you will be able to watch your little girl grow into a woman
Be lucky
Tivoli
Hi Tivoli
Thank you so much for this. Some days I am ok and some days I'm not. I had my little girl late at 40 and also have an 18 year old son, both of whom I love dearly and it breaks my heart to look at her some days.
I know I have some heavy weeks ahead and the treatment doesn't bother me as long as it does the job.
Still struggling with the fact I am in this position now after having a hysterectomy for cin3 which was all clear.
Love and hugs to you.xx
Yup!
Me too! Hysterectomy, all clear but chemo-rads and brachy anyway. Sadly I missed out on kids altogether but for different reasons. We all have up days and down days, but once you are through the other side you will likely grab the gift of life with both hands, enjoy every single day and never again think that housework should be given greater importance than having fun!
Be lucky
Tivoli
