Worried sick..symptoms

Cervical screening (smear test)
1

Apologies for the long winded post but can anyone put my mind at rest as im worried sick.

I had my first abnormal smear/colposcopy referral 2015 and diagnosed with cervical erosion and hpv and i would need to be monitored but feel pregnant.went for my follow up appointment after giving birth to my first son and on that appointment the nurse said she could see changes and i would likely need LEETZ she took a biopsy and said they would be in touch, i then recived a leter to say everything was normal and to attend my next appointment. I then moved to Ireland and have had no follow up appointments since 2016. I recently gave birth to my second son December 19 and while in labour a midwife passsed a remark on how irritated my cervix looked so i mentioned this to my doctor at my postnatal appointment but due to Covid19 all smears have been postponed. I then went to my doctor afew weeks back as i was having irregular spotting, fatigue, irritated, painful intercourse, she took bloods and came back as underactive thyroid which i now take meds for however this didnt explain the painful intercourse so she examined me and her word where "yes im not happy with the look of that(my cervix) and sent and emergency referral for colposcopy. For the last week iv had spotting and pelvic pain especially on my left side. When you Google these symptoms they show as signs of advanced cervical cancer :( i have myself worried sick as i have two small kids and can't stop thinking the worst. Has anyone had similar experience which turned out ok. Please help.

2

My experience was not similar to yours, but I stull wanted to send you hugs and support. I know tjis is scary and that your mind is running away with you, but try not to let your mind go too wild until you have all the information. I had a doctor tell me I had  cervical cancer while  was on a colooscopy table and even start talking anout chemo and radiation and when all the pathology came back I had CINIII. Then the next year my doctor told me my cervix looked good, but I had invasice cervical cancer. 

I can't speak for you and what your body is feeling, but it was my experience and a lot of lady's experiences on here that once you hear some bad news and your brain starts to imagine the worst, all sorts of new symptoms seem to appear. I got hyper focused on my body and every twinge seemed related and sinister. I was just sure it was in my liver and lungs and all my lymph nodes due to various imagined symptoms.

Be kind to yourself and try to rest and get some distraction. All the worry won't move you forward. Rest on the knowledge that cervical cancer is very treatable, so even if somehow you have it, they will get it taken care of and you will move on with life.

Sending all my best energy your way!