Hi,
Recently diagnosed with 3c cc.
Tumour is poorly differentiated squamous cell carcinoma, 2.4mm/9mm. Its effecting one lymph node and the surrounding ones are inflamed/enlarged.
Treatment will start in two weeks.
I'm overwhelmed, terrified and petrified from reading so many side effects and to possibly think it will/can come back/kill me.
I'm feeling extremely negative and down at the moment. I'm sure other newly diagnosed are also.
Did anyone come out of THIS with no /few long term side effects or damage from their radiotherapy/chemo/branchy to their mind/bowels/bladder/nervous system/vaginas?
How many years have you been NED Or clear?
I'm not moaning... I just need something to help me focus on life after this as my mental health is shot at the moment.
Keeley x
Please, please don't think I see your comments as negative or anyone else's on here. The problem is I've got myself into a deep dark hole and I need to hear some positive things for my own mind. You have all been so supportive and lots of information and advise has been given. I read through threads and I see the positive, support, help and encouragement but then I start to delve deeper or over think... Its all become an obsession tbh. However, what this forum has given me are questions to ask the nurses and doctors. I admire all of the strength from all the warrior goddess past and present, spirit and earth side.
I need to refind my strength as I have been through so much emotionally the last 26 months due to my beautiful mum being left undiagnosed with a cold sore to the brain for 11 days that has left her severely brain damaged and I have had to use all my strength to make her live and get treatment she needed.
I've only just managed to get her back in the same county as me when I suffered the massive bleed, my one and only symptom. It was the day I was moving her into her new nursering home in fact. I thought once I moved her to a better place, closer to home I could scrape back some normality for my three children 11,9 and 4 and they could have more of me, their mum back. It occurred to me today when I was walking to my radiotherapy meeting with My 4 year old that she has been by my side through near on every hospital visit/appointment I've been on in the last 26 months for either my mum or me. It occurred to me she has seen inside more hospitals than farms/zoos/play centres or that I've been rushing around tidying, making food because of being so thinly spread because of all the stuff with my mum.
I hope I haven't upset or offended anyone. My intentions were never this.
I see you all as wonderful, strong women whom would never wish this on their worst enemies surviving through their worst nightmares and helping so many other women faced with the same to overcome and raise higher.
Keeley
