Please help (children mentioned)

Hi I'm newly diagnosed with an early stage 1b cancer. I feel completely overwhelmed by what is happening. I know this is early and I have been given surgical options for treatment e.g. Hysterectomy or trachelectomy. I'm scared though. Everything seems frought with risks. I have been to the GP as I'm not coping. I'm struggling with feeling so well but being told I'm poorly and need radical life changing surgery. All I can see is horror stories.. I'm terrified of what will happen next. Please help. Jen

Hi jen

 I'm so sorry to hear about your cc. Where you are at right now is the worst part. Once you can get your head around the fact that cc is curable and with yours being an early stage even more so You will feel better  

I was diagnosed early this summer as 2b and it was very hard between diagnosis and treatment. I needed some pills to cope at first because I was so overwhelmed with so many emotions. My advice is to stay away from Google as it will do absolutely no good to you. 

Read through previous posts and you will soon realize you are not alone and that you can defiantly get through this. This forum has helped me tremendously and it is the place to come for questions or reassureance and just to vent. 

Dont be afraid to post any issues as there are so many wonderful ladies who are and have been in the exact same position you are in right now. We are here to help support each other and offer any advice we can. 

Pls try to rest as much as you can because a rested mind will think more clearly  

You are not alone in this!!!!

xxx

 

Hi Jen:

It's a big shock, isn't it, especially when you're feeling well.  There's something about this kind of diagnosis which makes you feel like you should be feeling like crap. 

I'm so glad you found us. Surgery is not all doom and gloom. You are super lucky, although I'm sure you're not feeling like it right now, because this has been caught really early. If you're young, go for the trachy as it will preserve your fertility. If you have your family, go for the hysterectomy as it's an easier op (for the doctor). 

There are tons of posts on here talking about the surgeries so have a nose through them. 

According to my doctor, if you had to choose a cancer, this is the one to have. It is slow moving and generally tends to hang out in a contained area. There are very good treatments and it is very cureable. Don't Google; the info is soo out of date.

You're in for a few wobbly months, I won't lie.  This diagnosis is such a shock and you will have a ton of ups and downs. But, it won't be long before all this is over and you will move on with your life.

Keep chatting on here. I think you'll find everyone's experiences very reassuring and supportive.

Take care

t x

Thank you so much for writing back.. It seems that night time is the worst. You all sound such brave and strong ladies. 

Im struggling to make decisions about what to have for tea at the moment. I have a 12 year old son who I am very lucky to have. I had him when I was 20 and his dad walked out on us. I've met a new chap and I've been happier than I have been in years. He does not have children though And he says he would like them. I feel like the trachy is an option but I'm so worried about the risks of something going wrong. Then what if he leaves anyway and it's just me and my son again. 

Both operations sound Horrendous. I'm a single mum who just needs to get back to work to support my son. 

sometimes I feel like I can do this, then I'm really angry and other times I wish I just wasn't here to have to face any of this.. It's like a horrible nightmare Xx

Hi, Jen1g. I'm sorry that you find yourself with the same ordeal with us herebon this forum. I know how you felt really.. I was lost & confused when I found out that I have endocervical adenocarcinoma last month. For 3 nights.. I can't sleep.. so I went a long walk by the sea trying to calm and think. First thing in my mind is my son (soon to be 12y.o. this month) and I am a single parent but my father helps on raising my kid back in my country in Asia since I just came here in Europe to work & support him. Anyways, I know that everything is going so fast but we have to face this.. as a mom and a woman.. we are strong enough to face this challenge. Think on a positive side.. at least we can still do something about it since we find out our diagnosis quiet earlier.  Stay strong. Hugs! :)

Thank you for your kind words. It is so reassuring to hear from you all and that despite feeling very alone you are all here fighting your own battles. 

Im lucky I know what this is early and I have a wonderful son. I have been trying to work out the pros and cons of each operation, I'd be great full if anyone who has experience of this could tell me these are things I should consider or just things I'm feeling anxious about 

So hear goes. 

Trachelectomy

Pros - possible fertility (however 30-40% chance of natural conception, increased risks of late miscarriage/pre labour/need for c-section, perhaps shorter recovery time

cons - much longer complex operation/lots of risks to bladder/bowels, if there are not clear margains then this would result in a hysterectomy, if there is spread to the lymph nodes the chemo/rad would impair fertility anyway, limited contraception, maybe longer time in hospital, self cathaterisation sounds awful

Hysterectomy 

Pros - certainty that all cancer is removed, no periods (!), shorter operation 

Cons - loss of fertility, longer recovery period, similar surgical risks, possibility of earlier menopause, 

this is what I've come up with but what other symptoms or side effects could I be left with after these.. I need to live for my son but Im overwhelmed. 

My boyfrie wants a baby I'm not sure I do but this decision is forcing me to think about it. I don't know what to do : ( 

Hi Jen :-)

(((((HUGS)))))

There are just two more things I think you need to understand about surgery;
1 - what is removed cannot be replaced, but what is not removed can be removed later
2 - you will be unconscious so it matters not one wit to you if the surgery takes 15 minutes or 15 hours.

So I would recommend going for the trach. You will recover more quickly & it keeps your options open with regard to family.

Try not to bundle the "what if he leaves anyway?" fears in with the dealing with cancer and bringing up your son responsibilities. They are entirely separate issues. Certainly if you shut him out he would be more likely to leave, so ask him to decide what you should be having for tea :-) No, I am not being flippant here. I completely understand that your whole world is in a liquidiser at the moment, spinning so fast that you cannot focus properly on anything at all. So by getting the boyf to take some responsibility for the unimportant stuff not only takes some responsibility off your shoulders but also helps to keep him feeling included and important :-)

(((((HUGS)))))

Be lucky :-)
Tivoli