Hi all
New person here. My mum (aged 63) has just been diagnosed with Stage 2b squamous cell cancer of the cervix which has spread to the lymph glands in the pelvis. The consultant said if they operate they wouldn’t be able to get it all, so there will be no operation, straight to radiotherapy and chemo.
I’m just checking in really. Feeling a bit shell shocked today, and that I should be doing something.
A couple of Qs.
How poorly is mum likely to be during chemo and radiotherapy? What can I best do to help? She lives by herself over 100 miles away from me, and will be having her treatment in her local area, so I can’t bring her to live with me. I can’t move in with her because I work and have 2 children in school. Yesterday I managed to accompany mum to her appointment in between school runs - 4.5 hours on the road. Will she be OK Mon - Fri by herself? She can get hospital transport to her treatments, but I feel bad that she will be by herself Mon-Fri.
She noticed her first symptom (post-menopausal bleeding) 6 weeks ago, went to her GP 3 days after that, and this is where we are now. Her last smear was in 2012 and was apparently clear. From what I had read this didn’t seem right if she is Stage 2b already so I asked her consultant yesterday and she said it would be very, very unlikely that the 2012 smear was actually clear, and that she has called for an independent review of mum’s last 3 smears. Should I be doing something about this? Or just forget it and concentrate on helping mum through this?
Thank you in advance if you have time to share advice etc, and sending my very best wishes and positive thoughts to all of you also going through this.
sorry to hear about your mums diagnosis, but you have come to the right place for help and advice. I am stage 2 and have just finished my second week of chemo radiation. Everybody reacts differently to treatment, have a wee look back over some treatment posts and check them out. I myself have not really had any issues these two weeks except for tiredness, lack of sleep due to steroids. i fully expect to start feeling a bit crappier over the next couple of weeks, but it will be mananageable as your care team are very good and will see to any problems that come up really quickly. Tell your mum to just take it day at a time and to listen to what her body tells her.
All you can do for now is just be a great support for your mum, don't stress about whats happened or not happened in the past. Mum needs to be calmn now.
im a stage 2b as well, I just finished my treatment early sept, if your mum lives on her own and manages her house cleaning and groceries and taking care of herself then she will manage during treatment. Somedays are harder then others but on the hard days you just want to rest and not have people around buggin you so I think she will manage.
Everyone is different on how they react to chemo and radiation but most people find it manageable. I know of a lady who is 72 that went through the same treatment and she managed just fine without having someone living with her. Try to be as supportive as you can emotionally but I'm sure your mum doesn't want to be treated like a sick child.
The first 2-3 weeks fly by without almost any symptoms it's not until near the end it gets a bit rough. Talk to your mom let her opinion matter. Worst case scenario the kids get a day off so you can all go help grandma. It's a good lesson for children to see their mom helping her mom as one day they will have to help you.
Hi! You are in the right place! As the others have mentioned it is different for everyone. I drove myself to all external radiation and chemo appointments. I am having someone accompany me to the brachys though. Mine are done under General Anesthesia so I have to bring a driver. Some parts of treatment were hard, some easy. I managed to take care of my two children while my husband worked out of town during the weekdays All while undergoing treatment. She will be fine and I'll assume she has no small children to take care of which will be a plus for her! Some days my housework might have gotten skipped. I always made sure I did my deep cleaning the night before chemo because I didn't know when I would feel well again. I had a bit of a harder time with the chemo than others did. My dr told me it's actually her younger patients that are more likely to have a negative experience with the Cistplatin vs the older women. So that may work in your moms favor too. This cancer is highly treatable in some cases even to stage 4! This website really helped me out and got me through my darkest hours. Lolli has been a godsend. She myself and many others have documented a lot of our treatments so just have a gander around the site. Good luck Hun and your mom is going to be just fine. It's worse mentally than physically.
Hi PJEC Of all the people that helped me through treatment it was my daughter who gave me the most strength to cope. I didn't physically need her through the chemoradiation but I did mentally and she was brilliant. She was 21 at the time and grew up very fast. If you mother knows she is at the forefront of your thoughts then she will be reassurred. I think you've proved that already by finding us. Jayne
One of the things you could do to help your mum if you are able is to cook some food for her freezer - that way she doesn't have to worry about cooking. The last thing I felt like doing during my treatment was thinking about food, especially on chemo days as they were so long.
I was able to drive myself to and from hospital all throughoutthe treatment apart from the braccy and that was only because I'd had a general anaesthetic.
With regards the smear I'd had a clear smear in march 2013 and was diagnosed with stage 4a in November 2015 - that's after going to the Dr with gyny problems for around 18m. I feel that I want to have my smears reviewed but don't know if that would actually make me feel any better so am still umming and aahing about that one x
It's all been said :-) No need for me to add another word :-) Just to let you know that I am adding my support to your mum, who's going to be just fine and that in my opinion she struck lucky missing out on surgery, chemo-rads are so much easier to recover from. Get her to join us here herself too :-)
