Lump in neck

Hi everyone it’s been a while since I posted here, i need some reassurance, was diagnosed in 2015 with 1a2 cc I chose not to have lymphnodes removed as the chance of it spreading was small, about a month ago I found a lump in my neck went to the doctor who said it was a swollen lymph node from me scratching my neck as at the time I had a small rash, now it is still there slightly larger not a lot but it’s the size of a bean it moves when I touch it but I am going out of my mind seriously planning my funeral, trying to figure out what is going to happen to my kids, it may sound stupid and over the top but I suffer serious anxiety about stuff like this since I was diagnosed, is there anyone that has had similar experience to me and can out fine? Xx

Hi Carlee:

CC is such a pain in the ass:  it's the gift that keeps on giving. Not only do we have to worry while we wait for diagnosis, we have to worry all through treatement and then, when that's all done, we have to worry if it's going to come back. Apparently, it does get easier, but we shall see.

You know in your head that this lump is exactly what the doctor said it is. He knows your history and if he had the slightest of slight concerns you would have been whisked off for a scan or some such. You are a 1a2 girl. The chances of CC coming back are about 1 in a hundred. When is your next check-up? If it's soon and your lump hasn't disappeared, you could show your doctor. Or you could go back to your doctor and explain that you're worried and see if he'll arrange a scan or something. Lymph nodes can pop up, epecially if you're under the weather. Yours popped up because you were scratching like a crazy fool. 

I was convinced, post treatment, that I had throat cancer, liver cancer and pancreatic cancer. It can't be helped, we are just going to worry. 

Take care,

love t x

Hi carlee. I was diagnosed 1a1 in January 2015, cone biopsy, no lymph nodes removed. About 6 months later I was drying my hair, felt a pain in my neck so put my hand there and felt a lump. I remember the panic, boiling hot, heart pounding. Anyway I went to the doctor and they said the same it's a lymph node, perfectly fine, moving around under the skin. I went again to see another doctor for a second opinion just to be sure lol. I can still feel it now actually but think it's gone down a bit. You really have to resist the urge to keep poking and prodding it as it will just aggravate it and it will stay up. I can also feel my lymph nodes in my groin, apparently it's because I'm slim they're just closer to the surface. You can get it checked again if you think it's grown but it might be you keep touching it, I used to really dig, roll it, prod around it, definitely doesn't help them x

Thank you for the reply, I have been to the doctors today and there are actually 2 lumps one larger than the other I have to wait two weeks and then go back if their still there, I really hope it's just my head being all paranoid, it is so hard to not worry isn't it? Il never be the same again the smallest things that I would not even give a second thought before, I now send  self in to total panic xx

Thank you for the reply, made me feel a bit better, when I went back to the doctors again today there are actually two lumps which are lymphnodes I have a sore ear so I have spray and was told if the lumps are still there in two weeks or get larger in between I have to go back, it's just strange iv never had these before and after googling symptoms of reacurrence and seeing lumps in neck on the list I am worrying myself sick xx

Lymph nodes do swell in response to injury or infection or like me some you can just feel, you may have had them before but never noticed. I think after cancer diagnosis it's really difficult not to panic but I think the chance of anything coming from your early stage is really unlikely. I used to google symptoms of recurrance, symptoms of different types of cancer and would convince myself I had them all. I saw a physciatrist who banned me from googling any cancer related things and also from self checking as I would obsessively check my self for lumps, moles, weight loss etc, it helped knowing I was banned by him otherwise I just couldn't stop myself. I hope you can be reassured by the doctor and that they are just normal lymph nodes, I know how scary it is x

Hi Carlee :-)

Please make absolutely sure not to poke or prod these AT ALL in the next two weeks. You can look but you better not touch :-) I think we all diagnose ourselves with at least three cancers we are never going to have so that makes you completely normal :-)

Be lucky :-)

I'm the same constantly on Google, convincing myself it is back somewhere else checking for lumps and moles I try not to do this but I can't stop in driving myself insane xx

Hi tivoli what happens if I do this? As I am constantly feeling them (I have two lumps now) in checking to see if they go bigger xx

Have you had counselling?  I had terrible health anxiety and it's awful thinking like that all the time. I'm alot better now, I still do it a bit but not so consumed like I was and I put it to the back of my mind now. If you keep poking your lymph nodes they may swell and certainly won't go down, you really have to try and not touch them for these 2 weeks x

I haven't had counselling how do I go about this, I'm a person that keeps all these feelings to myself I drive myself insane but hide it, I don't want anyone to think I'm crazy, but I would love not to feel this scared all the time but I don't know how I go about it, I have suffered with panic attacks for years before I got diagnosed but now my anxiety is worse for obvious reasons but if there is a way i could stop worrying as much I would take all the help I can get xx

Go to your gp and if it's like mine they give you a card with a number to call and you can self refer, think it was called therapy4you. It helped me quite a lot,  I think it's normal to worry a bit and be a bit more aware after being diagnosed with cancer but it's not good if it's bringing you down day to day. I was in a right state for quite a while afterwards, spent my days googling and it's all I really thought about and would go over horrible scenarios in my head. I just wanted someone to guarantee me I'd never get cancer again. Obviously they can't do that but they do help you put things into perspective and helped me to suppress the obsessive thoughts.  Sounds like yours was caught at a really early stage so like me just have to remind ourselves how lucky we were with that. I also was referred to the specialist cancer councillor at the hospital by my consultant because I had huge melt down at my first 3 month follow up but I wasn't keen on that one, a few things she said plus I had to go to the oncology department to see her and I didn't want to be there and set my panic off so the one I got through the gp was much better for me, lovely man, in my town and always gave me evening appointments which was good for me x

You'll just annoy them and they won't go down.

Hi Carlee, sounds like you are having a tough time of it at the moment. As a "retired" Cognitive behaviour therapist, I can say that sufferers of health anxiety do really well with CBT. It's not easy as you have to stop all your checking, stop googling and stop asking for excessive reassurance from people, but it can make a huge difference to how you feel and really lessen your anxiety. I would encourage you to discuss this with your GP who will make the referral. All the best with it.

Thank you so much for this I will ask my doctor tiink this could really help me what you are describing is exactly what I am like xx

Thank you for your reply i def need some sort of help i cant enjoy life like I used to, I am just not the same person I'm a mess so I will give this a try thank you xx