delayed biopsy results


I didn't sleep last night.

I was diagnosed Cin3 after a colposcopy/biopsy.

1 week ago I had a Lletz under general anaesthesia.

They told me, the biopsy results would be ready in one week, but if I didn't get a call from them it means good news. The week past I felt lighter as I didn't get a call about my results... But I thought I would feel sure only when I would hear the results so I called the hospital. They said surprisingly the results weren't ready yet. The nurse said it happens sometimes when it isn't an easy diagnosis... And that I should call back next week to get the results.

Now I'm just imagining the worse. I remember the surgeon saying 30% of the Cin3 ends up in cancer. 

It's been 5 years I have bleeding between my periods. I thought my periods were erratic. Told it to my gynaecologist the first year, the second year. She kept saying it might be due to my crazy lifestyle. I insisted for my gp to check my hormones but everything was OK. Then I had ultrasound revealing polystic (not syndrome) ovaries.

I always had lower back pain coming now and then but I thought it was due to my old sofa.

I had an undefined itchy psoriasis like the last 9 months around anus and vulva.

I'm exhausted. My partner recognised I wasn't as energetic as I used to be for the past year. 

Also my libido went straight down.

Of course it might not be linked but now that I'm waiting for the biopsy results that I know, are not normal, otherwise they would have been available earlier, I'm scared.

I've been reading your journeys... I'm not ready for that. It would change my life so much. It's not me. I'm sportive, travel a lot, aspire for a job with great responsibilities soon... I'm not ready to hear I have a cancer. I feel too young. 

I live in a foreigner country where the health system is so different from the one at home. My family is on the other side of the globe. My partners supports me but he feels disempowered, doesn't know how he could help.

I'm scared. 

What are the statistics about Lletz results after cin3? 

What could delay the biopsy results? What are the possible outcomes? 

I know some of you are getting through way more than this. Where do you find the strength to stay positive? I admire you.

Good luck in your journey.