So, firstly hi to those reading this- I really hope you're doing well & you're safe.
I'm 31, and my first colposcopy was in 2019 following a smear with abnormal cell changes & HPV positive. The consultant said nothing to be concerned about and on my way I went.
But last year (2020) I had another smear, which came back with high grade cell changes. So I was referred for a colposcopy and they found CIN3 changes, still HPV positive.
A few weeks later (well, at the start of January 2021) I went under general anaesthetic for a LLETZ procedure and I'm now awaiting results.
I've got terrible health anxiety and I've Googled my way through this. Woth those combined, I'm not coping too well and find myself becoming emotional over everything. Although I have supportive family, friends & partner.. it's having people to talk this through that have/are going through this that I need the most.
For me, CIN3 means 'it's cancer' - because somewhere in the depths of Google I've read those two things in the same sentence, and because I'm focused on every little pain, bleed & cramp.
So- what has it been like for you? Do you have health anxiety & going through treatment? Does Google bring you out in sweats?
I had my LLETZ the day before yesterday and find myself quite obsessive with searching what it all might mean, but I know in my heart there's no why of knowing until the results come.
It's so tough though isn't it? Just waiting and waiting.
I don't have health anxiety, but I did find myself talking to a friend yesterday and questioning whether I do at the rate I'm going. She was really helpful in saying its perfectly natural to think the worst in the circumstances we find ourselves in and we just have to keep reminding ourselves that the whole point of smears is to catch this early.
All good and well saying it, it still doesn't stop the mind monkeys popping out and saying 'yes but what if?' does it.
Today I've started feeling really achy all over and my next task is to Google is that normal.
Seriously questioning my own sanity!
I love KR's post from yesterday or the day before saying she received her letter. I've read it a few times and it's helped alleviate my anxiety somewhat because who knows, that could be us soon xx
Hi lovely, I know this message was a few weeks back but thought I would send you a message!
I completely understand where your coming from I suffer terribly with health anxiety and when I received my smear results back in august last year stating high grade severe I was in a total world of my own and convinced myself it was bad news, I couldn't sleep eat or anything really effected my relationship as I was just so anxious and snappy all day every day fast forward a few weeks i had my appointment at my local hospital for a colposcopy on the 9th September my 30th birthday of all days lol I was so bad I couldn't breathe and kept feeling dizzy the lady I had was amazing and picked up s straight away how I was feeling she took her time to explain about the appointment and the procedure turns out I had a small case of bacterial vaginosis and therefore had to go home and have treatment before having any cervical cells removed she did state she would not do this if she seen anything that she was worried about during the colposcopy fast forward a few weeks after treatment I went back and had the LLetz procedure done I worked myself into a state for absolutely nothing it was over so fast and just felt a bit uncomfortable but nothing major, after that I went home waited for my results which thankfully come back CIN3 has been completely removed I can't tell you the relief I felt was amazing I'm now just coming up to my 6 month check which I won't lie I'm a bit nervous for but going in hopeful and open minded this time! Also CIN3 is NOT cancer it is Pre cancerous changes which may or may never have turned into cancer and if so would take a very long number of years to do so! Hope your okay and everything went well and are feeling a little better now?
