Looking for a bit of reassurance from ladies in the know.
First my history. In 2009 I had CIN1 absnormal cells and was referred for colposcopy. They did a biopsy and confirmed that they were CIN1 cells but I had no further treatment - just 6 monthly smears. That was when I lived in Norwich. I think I had another smear after that that was still abnormal but wasnt referred for another coloposcopy. About a year after I had the abnormal cells, I moved to Manchester. It was a bit of a dynamic time - moved several times in a few months and didnt know whether I was coming or going. I probably went about a year without having a smear. I belatedly resumed smears in manchester and have had at least three possibly 4 since - all of them came back as normal. The last one was in January and was normal. However I have had post coital bleeding off and on ever since 2009. I also had a polyp removed in 2012 and it was sent for analysis and came back clear. I never actually got the results from it until my next smear test, which also came back clear. My last result said I had been put back on three year frequency. Happy days I thought.
This saturday, for fertility awareness reasons I was checking my cervix for the first time when I noticed it felt very lumpy. Cue panic etc. I got a very quick appointment with my GP (impressed) who took a look and said it didnt look sinister - it looed like a fleshey warty growrth, but because I was distressed, she would urgently refer me to gynae for an appointment to check it out. I got my appointment yesterday (again, impressed at the efficiency) and its on 23rd July, which feels like a long way away.
I'm stressing out now that all of my normal smear results were wrong and have missed the abnormalities, which have been left to get worst over the last 5 years. Even just being examined on monday has left me spotting blood until today - surely thats a bad sign!
Very upest as I had been trying to concieve but now my mind is racing thinking about hysterectomy, infertility, death etc. So how many people get CC who had normal smears and just bleeding as symptom? I'm one of those people that can imagine pain as well - if I have reason to believe something should ache I can feel it ache. Its hard to know whats in my head and whats real sometimes!
Any words that can talk me down off this edge of worry would be very much appreciated. Sorry for long rambly post as well.
Please try not to panic, I knw it is easy to say. have you thought about booking private smear, I did that, its not too expensive, about £100 and it may put your mind at rest?
Thanks for replying. I have thought about getting a private smear. I think I will wait it out for my appointment now with gynaecologist. It probably will be here before I can get anything done privately now. If I get fobbed off I definitely will go for a private one.
I've managed to get my worrying abit under control now but I still cant help but think the worst. Read lots of stories of women who have had normal smears for years but really the cancer has just not been detected. How terrible for them.
I thought I'd do an update in case anyone comes across this thread with similar fears.
At my appointment with gynae, the nice doctor lady took a look and said that she wasnt worried about it being anything bad- she said it looked like more of a nuisance than a threat. She did say she would have been worried if I'd had abnormal smears recently though. Not sure if that reassured me or not! Always scared that my smears are false negative because I've heard how frequently that could happen.
She scheduled me in for a colposcopy in two weeks time with the consultant to remove whatever it is. Again - that made me feel very worried - would have thought that two weeks and with a consultant would suggest something more to worry about.
She stressed several times though that I shouldnt be worried and that she honestly would tell me if she thought it looked bad. Very glad my husband came in with me because he keeps reminding me of the positive things she said when I get all negative. Just have to wait another two weeks now!
The good thing is though, she didnt make me bleed. So much better than the gp apointment - I bled for days and I think that contributed to my hysteria.
I hope everyone who is going through cervical and other troubles gets good news soon. Thanks to everyone on this forum - the positivity in the face of terrible nnews is so admirable. Reading all the posts over the last two weeks has helped me a lot.
Finally had my colposcopy after it being cancelled due to period being willfully 5 days late (my body is working against me)
The nurse said it looked like I had cervical ectropion but she could also see some viral hpv changes so did a biopsy. It looked disgusting. Apparently thats how columnar epithlial cells look and so its ok. Grossed me out though! She stressed that there was no evidence of the big C at this point and even if the biopsy came back confirming viral changes I wouldnt have to have it treated. I said I wanted it treated and she said that would be ok too but she didnt want to overtreat.
Will get my results in two weeks and then.
Still strugglnig to stay positive all the time and keep looking at the internet and pictures which I know doesnt help. My husband helps a lot and has come in all the appointments with me so that he can remind me of the positives when I feel low.
Fingers crossed for everyone reading that they get good news.
