I have been reading through this forum for the past few weeks and it has been really helpful so I’ve decided to post as I really don’t know what to do.
I had results letter from smear test and a colposcopy appt letter sent together saying I had high grade changes. This was in December. Had my colposcopy appt and she said the loop diathermy would have to be done under general anaesthetic. I freaked out as I am terrier of the idea of that. So came home very upset and confused. I suffer from depression and anxiety and have had a relationship breakdown and going through selling my house so it really is just hell at the moment.
I ended up getting an appt with the consultant as I cancelled my first surgery appt. She was lovely and said we can try with local anaesthetic and she listened to my worries. So had the loop 3 weeks ago. It went well and she said she was please as it was high grade change. She said it would be 6 to I weeks for results. Then I get a phone call this morning from the receptionist at hospital saying I have an appt first thing Monday morning. When I asked why she said the consultant has the results and wants to discuss them. So now I am so so terrified. If it was good news they would just send a letter.
I am nearly 31 and more than anything in the world I want to have children. I’m so scared on Monday she will say I have cancer and need treatment that will make me infertile or a hysterectomy or something. I’m so upset thinking the worst.
Sorry for the long post. Just don’t know where to turn
C x

Oh hun I've not got this far yet as just had my loop procedure this week bit couldn't read and not post anything.

Big hugs hun 

Kirsty x

Thank you Kirsty x

Well after a sleepless night and another day of crying and panic attacks I've convinced myself the worst. This is just awful :(

I hope it all goes ok for you and keep us posted as to how you are doing. 

Even if It means just having a rant. Iv found everyone on here have been amazing with advice and just general chat and such lovely people.

Maybe she just wants to discuss it with you because she knew that you struggled with the anxiety etc before.

Best wishes and hope all goes well for you x

Thank you. It's so hard not to think the worst. I've convinced myself the consultant is going to tell me the worst news and that will mean I can't have children. Which is the only thing I want in life. 

I'm just so upset and feeling not very strong at all. X