sorry to rant and moan but I feel I need to vent this off and at the moment I don't feel I can say it to my family so I hope you ladies don't mind me doing it here!
I had my PET/CT and MRI yesterday for my 3 month check up, I went in a nervous wreck as it felt like I was back at the start of my diagnosis, I have been getting myself wound up about the pending results which has affected my sleep and when I do finally dose off I wake up sweating from nightmares. I've got the usual aches and pains in my hips/pelvis that so many seem to be struggling with so I've managed to convince myself that it's normal and taking pain relief when it's needed doesn't mean I'm back at my prediagnosis stage.
I feel like I've taken myself into a bubble, it's my safe place where I'm alone and others don't need to see my struggle or deal with my overreactive emotions but at the same time I know I need to pop this bubble and let my family back in but I'm so scared to do it.
am i just making myself go crazy or am I just following a normal route (I like to think I'm not the only one to do this) I know that whatever the results I will bounce back to reality, but I'm terrible when it comes to waiting and I know I'm bringing this all on myself.
sorry again to rant