Spread of abnormal cells

Hello,

I’m really struggling after receiving some bad news after my recent LLETZ surgery under general anaesthetic. The affected area apparently had to be removed in 3 parts but tests on these cells showed it had not only spread in a larger area than they originally thought but it’s also spread to my vaginal walls too. My case has been referred to a specialist for further review before they then revert back to me with options however they said needing a hysterectomy is a strong possibility. I am absolutely devastated and consumed with worry about what may lie ahead with it all, including what options I have exactly, recovery and life itself never mind the possibility of the big C. The waiting until the end of the month for my ‘recommended next steps’ plan is driving me insane never mind the fact that because it’s CIN3, they said I’ll be in brought in for the ‘next phase’ within the next 12 weeks. I can’t bare the thought of any further treatment and absolutely heartbroken at even the mere though of having my womb ripped away.
Would I be insane to avoid the hysterectomy if this is what they recommend? I’d rather try anything else first and only opt for this if the alternative is… you know.
Has anyone had this experience or can anyone offer any advice?
Thank you x