So scared

Hi there. I had my colposcopy on 12 Feb. Taken into the office by the gynae and she said there were "suspicious" cells. Would send off to the lab. If they came back as OK, she wanted to do another test(?) under GA, possible MRI scan and spoke of a hysterectomy!! I am 54, didn't really have any "usual" symptoms, been putting different things down to the menopause. I am unfortunately morbidly obese and very concerned about the hysterectomy and any treatment given my size. Not really eaten for 2 days: everything a bit of a blur and can't stop crying. The doctor reckons 1-2 weeks before any results. Any comments/advice would be received very warmly!!

Hi, what you are feeling now is completely normal and most if not all ladies will say they felt exactly the same.  I was 2 days after my 57th birthday last August when I had the routine smear that led to the discovery of my CC.  I was absolutely terrified at the thought of the hysterectomy but whilst it's not a walk in the park it definitely wasn't as bad as I thought it would be.  Lots of big ladies go through the same thing so try not to worry too much about your size.  I was a size 20 last August but am a size 16 now - I am eating very differently now and went through a time when I could hardly eat.

I am now 4 months post op and things do get better.  The most important thing is to get this thing sorted so you can move forward.  The waiting for the results is awful, we will all tell you the same on that!  Once they know what they are looking at and you have a treatment plan then at least you feel you have started your journey.

The ladies on this site are brilliant at giving help and support and you will never feel alone here.  Please feel free to message me at any time if you need someone to 'talk' to.

Hugs,xx

Hi Cheryl. Thank you for replying: a BIG help. I had a phone call today to book in for an MRI scan - which is on Thursday 20th Feb at 5.00pm. Then on the 28th Feb I have a pre-op meeting??? I don't know if this is about the next "test" or about a hysterectomy but guess I'll find out on the day. I am still petrified. All I can think about when I hear I have abnormal cells is dying. I KNOW there are many many brave ladies out there - but unfortunately I am a great big coward. I have had upset tummy since getting the letter/phone call but guess I just have to go with the flow. Will let you know how things go.

Shirley. x

Hi Shirley

My guess is that the pre op is for the test under GA that you mentioned.  I had a pre op for my hysterectomy but knew beforehand that what was definitely going to happen which hasn't been confirmed yet to you.  However, I would recommend you phone to find out for definite.

I was terrified too and had never been in hospital before.  Everyone was so kind and supportive and it honestly wasn't as bad as I thought it would be.  

There are loads of success stories on this site, CC has got a very good rate of survival so try and concentrate on the positive - difficult I know.  People said that to me and I couldn't at the time!

My advice is to try and do other things to take your mind off it even if for a short while.  I did lots of reading and took up meditation which really helped big time.

Good luck, keep me posted.

Hugs,xx