Hi ladies advice needed I had a cervical cancer had Radical hys sept 2013 since then I've suffered server anxiety and panic attacks and depression of which I have never suffered before but to top it of dspite being put on HRT my vagina is so dry and uncomfortable and I feel so strange down below since really heavy anyway sex as been tried twice and even with lube I find it unbearable I think it's mental to,to be fair I have no sex desires at all but after being with my partner 11 yrs and only being 29 I pushed my self to do it for him really and hated it just feel so so low I feel like we're drifting further and further apart sorry for sounding so boring just bit fed up I guess and you guys are the only one I dare talk about this subject to because my friends will never understand thanks alot ladies x
Hello Angel. Gosh I think you're brave to even attempt sex so soon! My diagnosis really floored me & my husband and that side of our life went swiftly out of the window. All our energies following diagnosis seemed to be directed to getting through treatment. Once treatment ended & we were given the 'green light' by oncologists, we ''did it''!! It was ok for me however my husband was so scared of hurting me, nothing happened for him! It's fair to say both of us it seems have lost our desire for sex, it's simply not a priority any more. Our priorities have changed massively. At this point, the emphasis of our lives is on enjoying every day for all the other fantastic things it brings. For us, after all that has happened, life is precious and sex comes far down the list of priorities. Sometimes if you dwell too much on something it becomes a far bigger problem than it actually is. On the occasions we have sex it has been spontaneous and if it's good & without problems - then good, if it's not then we don't let it spoil everythling else.
I had my rad hyst in September and was very nervous about sex. Like you wanted to be close to my husband but really scared. Would it hurt? Was there anything left? How would I feel? My husband was just as worried as me. We didn't want it to be a disaster, because where do you go from there? My advice is try to talk about it so you each know what you are worried about. Take it slow and don't worry if you are not successful the first few times. We got some extra lubrication but I didn't like that. I felt different but I went with it, accepting that I was different so I would have a new normal. It took us a few attempts but I never felt under pressure. Good luck x