scared and unsure x

Hi guys, just looking for some advice.
I've been having smear tests done since i turned 19 (im 28 now) and since the first one ive been having abnormal readings. I had my first child at 20 and second at 21 and seen then things are just getting outta hand. ive been going for smear tests and going to my gyne clinic for other reasons as both my ovaries are covered in cysts. three years ago they told me i wouldnt have anymore kids because my ovaries are to badly covered unless i gave it two years of trying and if no sucess they would operate. (i didnt want any more kids at the time) so i wasnt to worried but i kept my coil in anyway. Doctor put me on HRT for a couple of months to try get my body back to normal i guess because my hormone levels are too high, made no difference so was taken off it. So roll on to last year my third smear test came back with cin 3 so i was referred to cervical clinic and had a colposcopy after which i was brought back for Lletz in april which i was told not to worry i would be as healthy as an ox after it. november i had my check up smear which came back cin 3 again so i had a HPV test which came back normal and was told not to worry everything is fine. Went back today for my 6 month check up and was ushered into a room and told no its not a smear clinic i was called back to but the colposcopy clinic because somethings have shown up i asked what and straight away the first question was are you planning more kids i said wait what are you talking about yes now i would love one more but why? And half an hour talking about cancer (she did not say i had it but nor did she say i dont have it when i asked, its just the feeling i got from her and the way she spoke to me and the same from the following doctor. noone would answer my questions) she told me the lletz hadnt worked and with the hpv test been normal i would need more tests and then put her arm around me and wish me luck. i was taken aback because none of the nurses are ever like that. i met with a doctor and two nurses again and staright away the kids question came up i said you are all scaring me now what is wrong and the doctor said we will take one step at a time. he told me my tests arent good and that i have to try the lletz again because where the sevre changes are happening are to deep and high up in my cervix to reach. so he did a smear but told the nurse there was no point he knows what it is and nothing is going to change and it was a waste of time doing a smear but do it anyway and call me back for the lletz again. he told me with getting lletz more then once it causes early labour if i was to get pregnant (but again they have told me a few years back i couldnt have more). im scared to my wits end, cancer is rife in the family at the moment i take my uncle for his treatment every tuesday have done for th last four years and 2 years ago i lost 3 uncles to cancer in space of 4 months and i have a cousin fighting it too, most of the women in the family have had problems too but usually just the lletz treatment the once has cured them so i'm petrifed im going to be the one. i dont understand anything they said to me they left me with more unaswered questions then any thing. i dont know what to do or think :(

thank you so much for reading this novel (sorry about that) i just need some kinda advice


Oh my you poor thing! No wonder you're feeling anxious with all of these conversations but no real information. Were you given a next appointment for any results or clarification? Did they take any further biopsies so they can tell you for certain if it is CIN/CGIN or something else?

It may be worth writing down specific questions to take in with you the next time you see a consultant to ensure you get the answers you need.

Take care

I went back to one of the nurses after it and asked when do i come back she said once the results of the smear come back which could be anything from 6 to 8 weeks so i still dont know. No they said nothing about another biopsy just he knows what it isand smears are a waste of time, unless he reckons a biopsy is a waste of time too, im just lost. I k=think your right i'll make out a list tomorrow so ill have it ready and i think i might go see my own G.P tomorrow and see if she has any light to shine of it all for me.

You too hun,



Usually if it’s serious you’d know in a week, so waiting 6-8 weeks is a good sign.

Fingers crossed they will be able to give you a clear picture of a) what the situation is and b) how they will treat it.

Quite a few ladies have several lletz treatments until the CIN has been removed so hopefully they can give some more advice.

Keep us posted xx

Hi Naidy, I am one of the unfortunates who's first lletz didnt get everything. Forgive me if I have misread your post  but you are saying that when you had your follow up smear after treatment, it came back cin3 and they left you without treatment because your hpv test was clear. If I got that right I would be very suprised that they didnt follow up with further treatment/investigation then, guidelines are quite clear that cin 3 should always be followed up with colposcopy. When I had my 6 month smear after lletz it came back as cin3 and within a week I was back in to see the consultant to discuss further treatment. It doesnt seem right either that if your doc knows there is need for treatment that he would wait 6 weeks for smear results to tell him what he already knows before taking action.

Cervical cancer and pre cancerous abnormalities are one of the most teatable and slowest growing but that is no excuse for health professionals to dilly dally. I know how everything falls out of your head when you go to appointments and all the question you have dissappear, I went for a pre op last week and had tons of things I wanted to ask, I didnt write them down and on the day the only thing I asked was how long would I be out for! And I only asked that as I thought I might look a bit dim if I didnt ask something Embarassed

Is there somebody who could go with you next time so they can help you make sense of everything they say. I think chatting it over with you gp is a great idea.

From what my consultant said when he explained about multiple treatments and fertility was that it can weaken the cervix, if you get pregnant in the future they can monitor how your cervix is doing and stitch it if necessary so if you want more kids, depending on what treatment they offer you It can still be possible. 

I'm having a cone and top hat done next week, fingers crossed that will get everything this time.