Hi guys, just looking for some advice.
I've been having smear tests done since i turned 19 (im 28 now) and since the first one ive been having abnormal readings. I had my first child at 20 and second at 21 and seen then things are just getting outta hand. ive been going for smear tests and going to my gyne clinic for other reasons as both my ovaries are covered in cysts. three years ago they told me i wouldnt have anymore kids because my ovaries are to badly covered unless i gave it two years of trying and if no sucess they would operate. (i didnt want any more kids at the time) so i wasnt to worried but i kept my coil in anyway. Doctor put me on HRT for a couple of months to try get my body back to normal i guess because my hormone levels are too high, made no difference so was taken off it. So roll on to last year my third smear test came back with cin 3 so i was referred to cervical clinic and had a colposcopy after which i was brought back for Lletz in april which i was told not to worry i would be as healthy as an ox after it. november i had my check up smear which came back cin 3 again so i had a HPV test which came back normal and was told not to worry everything is fine. Went back today for my 6 month check up and was ushered into a room and told no its not a smear clinic i was called back to but the colposcopy clinic because somethings have shown up i asked what and straight away the first question was are you planning more kids i said wait what are you talking about yes now i would love one more but why? And half an hour talking about cancer (she did not say i had it but nor did she say i dont have it when i asked, its just the feeling i got from her and the way she spoke to me and the same from the following doctor. noone would answer my questions) she told me the lletz hadnt worked and with the hpv test been normal i would need more tests and then put her arm around me and wish me luck. i was taken aback because none of the nurses are ever like that. i met with a doctor and two nurses again and staright away the kids question came up i said you are all scaring me now what is wrong and the doctor said we will take one step at a time. he told me my tests arent good and that i have to try the lletz again because where the sevre changes are happening are to deep and high up in my cervix to reach. so he did a smear but told the nurse there was no point he knows what it is and nothing is going to change and it was a waste of time doing a smear but do it anyway and call me back for the lletz again. he told me with getting lletz more then once it causes early labour if i was to get pregnant (but again they have told me a few years back i couldnt have more). im scared to my wits end, cancer is rife in the family at the moment i take my uncle for his treatment every tuesday have done for th last four years and 2 years ago i lost 3 uncles to cancer in space of 4 months and i have a cousin fighting it too, most of the women in the family have had problems too but usually just the lletz treatment the once has cured them so i'm petrifed im going to be the one. i dont understand anything they said to me they left me with more unaswered questions then any thing. i dont know what to do or think :(
thank you so much for reading this novel (sorry about that) i just need some kinda advice