Hi all,

I feel so stupid posting this but need to get it out there.

When I am on my own driving my mind keeps wondering...I think it'd be easier to be in a rta and die than go through this. I really can't think like this because I have a darling child who needs me. I am so terrified og this winning and taking me away from her. I don't want to die. 

Tbe second tthing is that I donated money to cancer charities on a whim in the hope it would make a difference to my outcome....how ridiculous is that?!


I just needed to put that out there.


Has anyone done anything similar or had similar thoughts or am I crazy?


No you are most definitely not crazy. Whilst I haven't had thought processes like yours, it is very scary time and everybody is different. CC is very treatable and has good outcomes. Your little one does indeed need you to try to be strong (easier said than done sometimes- I know).

Big hugs and positive thoughts coming your way

Rachel x


Thanks so much Rachel x

I feel like a loon x

Hi Sweet pea,

You're not a loon, we all react differently and I am quite sure if I had been the mother of a small child I would have felt much as you do.

Be lucky :-)