Recurrent cervical cancer all clear

[Greeni]

Hi all

I was diagnosed with cc 1b1 Adenocarcinoma in December 2013 , I had a radical hysterectomy , no further treatment. In January this year (2015) I was sent for a routine 12 month ct scan which I had in March , This picked up a left overian cyst, I was advised " it looked OK " I had this removed at the beginning of July , end of July I was told it was actually cancer and that the cervical cancer had returned to my left ovary.
I was then sent for a PET scan which came back clear, but my consultant said that " the resolution of the scan is not that great and microscopic cells could still be there that the scan wouldn’t of picked up"
I began 5 weeks of chemo and radiotherapy in September which finished 16 th October , my consultant wasn’t going to scan me again as he said this was pointless as if cancer was present I would be palliative now and palliative early treatment would not prolong my life , I couldn’t accept this and so went to my GP with my concerns , mentally I needed to know how the treatment had gone and if any cancer was there , my gp agreed to a ct scan which I’ve now had and came back clear , good news then I thought
I’ve recently seen my oncologist who although says he’s delighted the scan was clear , still points out that the scan wouldn’t pick up microscopic cells and advises me again that if this cancer does come back again it will not be treatable and I will be palliative ,
I should be very grateful the scan was clear and I am , I’ve read some awful stories about recurrent cervical cancer and the poor prognosis and I do consider myself very lucky it was caught early again and was able to treated but I just can’t get out of my head the what ifs ,
What if there is microscopic cells still there ? There’s no third chance for me as the consultant says I will be palliative , the thought of being diagnosed palliative terrifies me ,
I’m just not handling this well at the moment , feeling very low and thinking about the microscopic cells that may still be there and growing , I hate feeling like this and feeling so negative when I should be smiling and positive as I’ve had the best possible outcome for this the second time round .

[hows]

Have a read of anticancer - a new way of life book by David Servan-Schreiber, it has helped to empower me against recurrent cc and change my life. Also http://www.ted.com/talks/william_li?language=en#t-842018 x 

[Anna_Sparkles]

Hi Greeni 

I'm in the same boat as I had a lung recurrence and had further treatment so I don't know what your oncologist is on about. You can have carbo/taxol chemo and that got rid of mine! I'm currently all clear too. One thing you must understand is that Palliative and terminal are two different things. Palliative is just another word for symptom control. It does not mean that it's terminal. Someone with diabetes is palliative in that they will never be cured of the disease but it's controlled and won't kill them. Does that make sense? Don't let the words scare you as there are no definite in this life. 

Love Anna xx

[365days]

Theres a brilliant article doing the ropunds at the moment. Just google 'Cancer mountain lion kale' and you'll find it!!

 

Why should you be happy when you've just had yo go through 2x the cancer experience? I'd be mad, angry and very sad. Don't fight yoour feelings. They are real and trying to feel how you think you 'should' will just put more pressure on yourself.

Try and get some counselling to let rip about your experiences in a safe way. I'm glad you have the all clear from your recurrence but can totally understand why you aren't filled with the joys of spring about it. 

 

[Tivoli]

Hi Greeni :-)

I just wanted to add that after 5 weeks of chemo-rads there is very little chance of there being any microscopic cells hanging around. We are all anxious about recurrence after treatment, and I can quite see that you might be more anxious than many having already had a recurrence, but do please try to take some comfort from all these responses.

Be lucky :-)
Tivoli