Preparing for first time since op


I am 8 weeks post trachelectomy with abdominal incision. My consultant told me to wait 8 weeks before sex but I am still bleeding just now anyway…

I had a feel and noticed I feel a lot shorter. I am a bit scared now that my partner will notice. I have told him my worries. I just wondered if anyone had any experience of the difference after this op?


im in the same position as you,well I had a radical hysterectomy in December. I'm much shorter too and am worried about how everything's going to fit!

its been 5 weeks since my op so we've not tried yet,I'm so nervous. Might have to have a few little drinks to make me more relaxed! I'm trying not to over think things I'm sure the more relaxed I am the better it will be.

good luck!

Thanks Mrs G! Hoping to wait til the bleeding settles. I am just worried it won't be as ahem.. fast I guess. Maybe I will have to start enjoying something more slow and romantic!


its definately diffrent!! A work in progress I think,still these things are sent to try us!!


im a lot shorter too, my advice.... use lub(lots) and go slow. I also found it's better to be on top for the first few times. That way you have control. It's defiantly a work in progress. Also... lots of wine. Lol

good luck

Hi All I'll be following this with great interest. I'm 14 months post rad hyster and keen to get back on the horse - but alas No horse. Am dating though as forever hopeful. 

Hi since posting this we have tried it a few times and with some luck but it doesn't feel the same. It is very difficult to begin with and I have had to use lube which makes me feel a little broken. It feels very tight to me. Each time I have had pain after and bleeding. I told my consultant and she just said to use lube and not much about the bleeding. We are finding other way to do things but sex isn't the same for me, it feels like a mission and makes me upset when things don't work and also inconvenient when I bleed even though it is only lightly for a few days after. I think we just need to keep trying and hope it gest better. I just don't feel we can be as spontaneous. Little sad but hoping things will improve x 

Hi Misstell,

I swear I'm not stalking you on the forums! You had the same procedure as me so when I see that you have written something in a thread I'm looking at I have to have a read!

I've got to wait until the middle of May before I can start having sex again but if I'm honest I really don't mind! After having pain and bleeding after sex for a loong time, then a LLETZ, then a cancer diagnosis plus a pelvic exam and the trach and all the aches and pains I'm getting frankly they could sign me off until next May and I'll probably be ok with it.

I'm rather terrified about the whole process which is rather depressing so I get where you are coming from when you say it should be fun and natural and spontaneous. Problem is after having your bits and bobs bashed around by medical professionals and witnessing what happens after it's rather difficult to find the inclination to have anything else near there or even see it in a particularly nice light.

You've probably got all that going in your mind as well and you're probably on edge already and so your body is naturally tensing when it comes to sexy times. Now because there seems to be 'pressure' to get back to normal its probably compounding that stress further and making you feel even more on edge and tense. It's basically a viciously shit circle.

It's easy to say because I'm not there yet (and not actually looking forward to it at all) but take it easy on yourself. Your body has been through such a bashing and there is definitely going to be a psychological impact as well as a physical one.



Hi Gerry

Sorry I didn't see your reply til now!!

Yes, I think that is a normal reaction for a lot of poeple. 

I am feeling a lot better now about things in the bedroom haha.

Have some unexplained pains lately so getting that checked out soon x