So tomorrow is exactly one year since I was diagnosed with stage 2b cervical cancer. Underwent 5 chemo, 25 radiotherapy and 4 brachytherapy finishing in September, which I felt I physically coped quite well with. Mentally iv had my ups and downs but really thought after I finished treatment and returned to doing my everyday things I would be able to put this all behind me. Had an area of concern that showed on my December follow up scan and a nodule that required some treatment in February. I'm due another scan next Thursday to be extra cautious. I manage to put a brace face on for my partner and friends but no matter how hard I try it never goes away, I can't accept that I will never be a natural mother and feel like I have been robbed, the emotional pain is unbearable some days and I just cry when I'm alone. I'm such a strong natured person and can't believe one year on I'm allowing this to effect me like this nearly everyday.
Having a bad day today and had to vent.