No Sexual Feelings

Hi Ladies,

Is there anyone else in my position? 1st abnormal smear 2006, LLETZ done in 2008, discovered stage 1A1 cervical cancer after LLETZ, was told they'd removed all the cancer & no further treatment was required, annual smears since then, all reported as negative, continued to have problems despire numerous tests wa stold all was normal, eventually saw gynaecology in 2013, had total hysterectomy Nov 2013, stage 1B1 cervical cancer discovered, (have since found out the reocurrence happened in 2011) been badly failed by the NHS as the treatment i got in 2006 was mis reported, had they done another LLETZ is would have been 95% succesful, anyway after hysterectomy in Nove 2013, went on to have another operation 7wks later (Parametrectomy) to remove fatty tissue, lymph nodes & vaginal cuff, just over a year on since second operation & i still get tired easily, my relationship has broke up as i'm not willing to even try sex, just wondered if any other women are going through anything similar? I've got no sexual feelings at all, not even for kissing cuddling or anything, i'm just wondering if its down to nerve damage, no-one seems to be listening to what i'm saying :( i'm sure its sexual dysfunction, thanks for listening ladies xx

Sorry to hear this Mandy. It could be the menopause??? It is quite common for the ovaries to fail after gynae surgery. Perhaps you could have your levels checked by your GP? I had a radical in August last year for 1B2 and my sexual feelings have reduced somewhat. Take some time out without pressure to focus on yourself. Take care now xxx

I have no mood for sex either. Perhaps because I was blaming sex for getting sick. I have had much worse problems than you did and I am still in pain but I don't think it's just that.

Have you ever thought of consulting a psychologistpsychologist? Most of the time such problems are mainly psychosomatic. We all need support after going through cancer. 


Hi Mandy :-)

I have absolutely no desire for sex, kissing or cuddling either. I did for a while after all my treatment but it has all petered out to nought. I'm 54 and even though lots of women do lose their sex drive during menopause you also hear about people still having sex in their 70s. I don't know which is more normal to be honest with you. Can you answer that one Helen? I suspect that I may have been able to keep the libido going if the husband was a nicer person but I couldn't swear to it. Perhaps it's the other way around and the husband has become not-so-nice because he's not getting rewarded any more. And anyway, I'm too hot all the time to be near to anyone. If it's bothering you though you should definitely see a counsellor of some description.

Lots of love


Thanks for the replies ladies, to be honest Tivoli it's not bothering me at all, i have no desire for kissing or cuddling either, it's just thinking who would want to be in a relationship with me if there's no sex or intimacy? My partner left a while ago, said he couldn't accept the fact i didn't want sex again



That's so sad Mandy, to be let down like that after everything you have been through. Like you, it doesn't bother me at all that I don't want sex. I know I used to like it and it was fun, but so was being four years old. The good times did last a decent length of time too so that's a thing to be grateful for. It's just such a shame that men's sex-drive seems to be so robust and so long-lasting. I know several women who have stood firmly beside their chaps when they were being treated for prostrate cancer (just like us, loss of sex-drive plus hot flushes to boot). You never hear of them walking off in a huff of disappointment do you.

Great big hugs