No assurances

Hi everyone, ive quietly been sat at the back of the class for quite a while now reading amazing stories from warriors alike.
I finished my chemorads at the end of December for recurrent CC. It was a rough ride just getting to that but as i needed a uteric stent and colostomy stoma forming prior to treatment. During treatment i had a rough ride of continual sickness and icing on the cake was covid leading to neutropenic sepsis. But hey i did it i got there and rang that bell proudly.
3 months on and ive just had my first ct scan with dye contrast and results.
Well its shrunk more than half in size however when i heard that there was still around a 3cm mass my heart just sank. Theyve said they will leave me for another 3 months as treatment continues to work but i just dont feel reassured. Heres the extra but i keep stewing on too. So i had my stent changed after continual aches and pains which they claimed to be down to it, however aches and pains have remained and now i cant help but feel its the cancer growing again. I just kinda feel left in no mans land watching and waiting to see if this next scan shows growth or shrinkage and i feel lake my head cant take it anymore.

Lisa xxx

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I am so very sorry you are going through this @Lisa_xox . You have been through so much. I understand how scary aches and pains can be, but most of us have them post treatment so try not to read too much into them. I have everything crossed for you - the doctors wouldn’t have told you that the treatment continues to work if it wasn’t true. Try to hang on to the hope and give yourself some time to rest and heal. Focus on the things you enjoy and the people you love rather than the next scan. Eat well, exercise gently, get fresh air. I know how hard this is to do - I am waiting another three months for scans to tell if my health issues this year are due to inflammation or recurrence - my last two scans have been inconclusive. (I ended up with a colostomy post treatment and may need a stent or nephrostomy if my kidney doesn’t unblock. Your story sounds similar to mine.) Not trying to make this post about me - I just want you to know I do understand how hard it is and that you aren’t alone. :smiling_face::two_hearts:

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Hi Lisa,
I just wanted to say that we hear you and you’re not alone. I’m not a regular commenter but I do regularly read the new posts and I think so often of you all.
So, you’re not alone.
I also wanted to add that I finished treatment 1b3 chemo rads brachy just under a year ago and I still had a small area showing. A year on it’s still there, hasn’t changed and I’m living my life. I have an mri every 12 weeks (I’m going for one today!) and we have a stressy time then but still, I’m here.
I’m not saying that this will be your journey but what I am saying is that there’s more than one journey and many (if not most) lead to a full and happy life which is exactly what I’m wishing for you.
Much love x

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