New & really worried!

Cervical screening (smear test)
1

Hi :slight_smile: I’m new here and just wanted to get a few things off my chest and get a bit of moral support from you brave and lovely ladies! I will start from the beginning…

Since I was 20/21 years old (I’m 24 now!) I have always had this HUGE worry about cervical cancer. No idea why, I just have! I suffer badly with Health Anxiety so that does not help at all!

I used to be on the pill, and when I was I occasionally spotted mid cycle. Went to numerous doctors for this and all said it was fine. Last year my anxiety really flared up so I went for some routine swabs at my GP’s following their advice. When the nurse was taking the swabs she said she noticed I had a cervical erosion which I believe is really common so I didn’t worry too much; but it was the GP’s guidelines to refer me to a gynecologist. So I went there and he said it was an erosion and left it there.

Me being me still didn’t believe him so I paid privately to see a gynecologist who also didn’t seem concerned and just said I had a cervical erosion. I paid for a smear - but the results came back inconclusive (this was Feb 2015) and was advised to come off the pill to see if that relieved any symptoms.

Since then I have come off the pill and I have had no spotting at all which I’m trying to see as a positive! I do however have a discharge everyday (sorry, TMI!!) but I know I have had this for at least 3/4 years so I’m trying not to worry about that as surely if it was something more sinister it would have got worse or shown other symptoms?!!

But recently my anxiety is back with a vengeance and I am worried again about having cervical cancer! I went to my GP and explained all this so he did an internal examination and said all he could see was a cervical erosion and he wasn’t concerned at all. And of course they can’t do a smear because I am under 25!

I have made another appointment for tomorrow to have a private smear as I cannot worry about this until I am 25 - it is taking over my whole life.

I just keep thinking the worst case scenario and that I have all the risk factors. I lost my virginity at age 15 and I do smoke and have done since I was about the same age, 15. Stupid I know, but smoking is the only thing that can keep my anxiety under control. My plan is if my smear comes back fine I can really concentrate on getting my anxiety under control and stop smoking! But until then I just keep thinking 'whats the point in quitting if I am going to have this, this and this. I feel like I am constantly battling against myself.

I am just so worried as you can probably tell and just keep thinking at the very very least I have severe abnormal cells :frowning: So sorry for the HUUGGEEE message, just really felt like I needed to get all this off my chest!

Any advice would greatly be appreciated!

Lots of love xx

2

Hello. I was treated for a cervical erosion last September because i had intermittent bleeding. If yours isn't causing you any bother they'll leave it but also discharge can be from the erosion and they can cauterise them. They are common if you've taken or take the pill. I think you would be bleeding if there was anything sinister going on especially after sex. Good luck with your smear. Health anxiety is horrid, i know what you're going through x

3

Thank you so much for your reply. I am hoping it's all just due to my erosion. Glad you got yourself sorted :). Health anxiety is horrid :( so hard to cope sometimes. 

Im even too scared to have sex incase I bleed! I had sex at the weekend for the first time in about 6 months but it was the last day of my period so I did bleed a little bit, but putting it down to it being the last day of my period as I've not had any spotting between periods at all. 

Just want to get my life back!

Xx 

4

Hi,

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE stop smoking.When I was first

diagnosed I smoked and I asked if my smoking had anything

to do with the cancer and the consultant said without a pause

YES!!! So if you are truly trying to be pro active STOP smoking

and find another way to self soothe.Have you asked your GP?

And if you have had all the test it looks like you can be assured

you don't have cervical cancer,so take this good news and use

it to get and stay healthy.

I would give passiflora tincture a go its really good for anxiaty

you can buy it at the health food shop.

All the best for a long and healthy life

Take care

Becky x

5

Thank you for your reply :) and I'm so sorry you've had to go through it all.

I really really want to stop. I just feel as though I can't stop with this anxiety because I'll go into a massive breakdown. 

I've got my smear this morning so then I'll know once and for all but waiting for the results is going to be so difficult. 

I feel so stupid for smoking :( I just know it's going to be bad news and there's nothing I can do :( 

Take care xx 

6

Hello, just thought I'd do a little update.  Just had my smear and I bled during it :(. The doctor who did it said he applied a little bit more pressure to ensure it didn't come back inadequate. 

I feel even more worried now :( had anyone else ever bled during a smear? 

The results should only take 3-5 days but I still feel like it's a lifetime away and it's going to be bad news :(. 

He said its very rare for someone who is 24 to have anything seriously wrong, and if there was something I would have noticed other symptoms too like bleeding between periods. 

Sorry for the rant I just don't know what to do :(. 

Xx 

7

Anxiety is an awful thing to have to cope with alone

try and get the courage to speak to your GP about it.

I hope everything is ok and you can put your mind

at ease.If the smear comes back with changes,it is

very early days and as you can see from my story

and many other ladies,even advanced cancer is treated

succesfully.

You don't need to be sorry for airing your fears,its a

good thing to write things down.

Take care

Becky x

8

Thank you Becky your reply helped loads :) and I see you're doing well which is fabulous!

All the stories are so inspiring that I've read and that helps too. 

If I did have the worst outcome,  I just don't think I would emotionally be able to deal with it.

I can't eat or sleep and this is only for the result of a smear! I get so angry with myself sometimes and feel like I'm always at a dead end!! 

Xx 

9

.......Just when the caterpillar thought

the world was over,it became a

butterfly......

Feel free to chat anytime(((HUG)))

Becky x

10

Hi how are things have you had your smear results back? x

11

Hi tan, thanks for your reply!

My results came back severe dyskaryosis and a query on glandular neoplasia. Not the best results but I've just about calmed down. 

My colposcopy is on Tuesday so just playing the waiting game now :( 

Lots of love xx