I hope this is ok me putting this in here..
So after being diagnosed with CC 2b last year, I had chemorads and brachy like a lot of ladies on here have had. i'm 29, no children previous and I didn't have the opportunity to extract eggs prior to treatment or explore any other options as my codition was so bad at the time. I was bleeding severely and needed to start treatment as soon as possible. The fertility specialists we had managed to see straight up said it was too dangerous to even try and save eggs or anything else due to it posing such a high a risk to my life. I understood this, it's your life which matters at this point, and at least i didn't have to make the decision whether to postpone treatment or not as the decision was made for me, and that was that. It hurt though, a hell of a lot, we had been looking at embryo freezing only a few months before and were hoping to start the process as i became unwell.
6 months ago i made the decision to try and put this side of everything into a box on a shelf until i was ready to deal with it, and making that decision had helped me a lot, until now. Yesterday it hit me like a brick, or a ton of them, being dropped from a very big height. I really don't know how to handle this, this time last year we thought we would have challenges but nothing like this, we had hope and i'm hoping i'll find a way to cope with how things have changed, but right now knowing that this special day isn't ever going to have the meaning i was hoping for has really got me.
I know lots of people are affected by this and i hope putting this in here hasn't caused distress to anyone. I just needed to post somewhere where there might be someone else who has experienced this after finishing treatment. Any help on this is greatly appreciated.
Sending lots of love and hugs to anyone who needs it at this time of year.
Thanks in advance to anyone who reads.