I had LLETZ treatment done 3 days ago and after being awake late at night for the third night in a row and googling up on the LLETZ Procedure and the recovery period I came across this site.
When I first discovered that I was to have a colposcopy, I had many friends who advised that they knew someone who had been through it and not to worry as everything was fine and it was no big deal, I know they were trying to put my mind at rest and only had the best intentions, but all it did was belittle how I was feeling and made me feel like I was wrong to be anxious.
So anyway, I had the colposcopy and had to undergo the LLETZ procedure there and then... Luckily my mum was able to go with me and I regressed back to being a child holding my mum's hand, crying and shaking the whole way through it (in actual reality it was nowhere near as painful as I had built it up in my head to be) afterwards, my mum dropped me off at home to rest... So all done and dusted... Or so I thought.
For the last three days since I had the treatment done, I've not been able to get the procedure and the thought of LLETZ and all things related out of my head... I'm finding myself up at 4am in the morning, reading up on other peoples experiences with it and am in floods of tears... And I can't understand why. Why am I finding this so hard, emotionally, to deal with... Surely it should all be over and done with (bar from the full recovery)
I'm beginning to feel very weak (emotionally) and keep telling myself I need to get over it and that it's a pretty standard procedure that lots of women go through and that I need to get a grip. Why am I struggling emotionally to even read up on the subject of all of this... I literally cannot explain what it is that I am upset about and was wondering if anyone else has felt like this or can offer any insight into why I'm feeling this way?