just need a warm heart to talk to :(

Hi all,i am new to jos trust and i am just literally wanting someone to tell me im not the only one!!

my story quickly;

July 2016 i had a smear test after lots of changes i had noticed to my body.I also attended a colposcopy for a biopsy test.A short while after my biopsy test,my smear results came back no change no action needed so i was relieved yet still confused to these unexplainable changes.However…

6 weeks later,after returning from a family holiday,i walked into a letter stating severe abnormalities had been detected from my biopsy test and i was to contact the hospital to arrange my LLETZ procedure.Upon contacting the hospital i was informed i had CIN3 which is also known as stage 0 carcinoma in situ and some mdical staff also class it as stage 0 cervival cancer meaning the cells had turned cancerous but are confined to 1 area (as far as they know) i will know more after my LLETZ as further investigations will be carried out from this procdure.I have 1 week until my procedure and will then have to wait on any further tests and results.This is all the info i have been given so am grateful for such honesty and helpfulness of the medical staff ive come across so far

But this hit me like a train. ( im sure you all felt the same when finding this type of thing out )Being only 26 i have struggled to come to terms with what is happening but am slowly getting there. Im just finding that i am becoming very angry and snapping at everyone close to me without meaning to.They are trying to help but im just ending up biting their heads off all the time and then im left with mounds of guilt.

I only found out i have this 4 days ago so is all new to me and am still trying to get over the shock of it. But everyone just keeps saying stop worrying there isnt anything to worry about itl be out next week!!! Am i the only wanting to scream back at them that it is NOT ok and yes it may be going next week but more tests are to be done before finally confirming all ok and this does NOT change the fact it has been here in the 1st place!

Arrrggghhh i just want to go in a quiet blacked out room and scream until nothing more can come out of me!

Is anyone else feeling anything similiar or am i just going nuts?!

Sorry for lengthy moan but i dont know where else to go my family and friends and partener have already heard enough and now whenever i mention it im told to stop goin on about it and dwelling on it because “its getting sorted”

my heads going to explode :frowning:

Hi Faye,

Just wanted to let you know that you're not the only one.

I'm in a very similar situation and am feeling really strange about it all. That's the only way I can describe it - one minute I'm sad then i'm angry and I don't know why.

I'm not sleeping or eating and everyone is telling me that it's going to be fine and stop worrying!!! 

When is your LLETZ schedulded for?

Wishing you the best,

Lexy xxx

Hello girls 

I am a lttle older than you both I am 49 i was told on 15th March that i had stage 2b advanced cervical cancer.

I was up to date with all my smears.

I like you Faye wanted to shout at everyone when all the tests where taking place i it was backwards and forwards to hosptial and people kept saying it will be ok dont worry . Its normal to worry and to be scared about the results . Its also worrying for your family aswell and they will be trying to be strong for you aswell.

It is a very emotional time and the support of your close ones is very important talk to them and let them know how you feel even when you are angry.

I can totally relate to how you are feeling as I was like that aswell it did my head in lol.

I also had a LLETZ procedure. 

I have had 5 weeks of chemotherapy 5 weeks of radiotherapy everyday, and 3 internal radiotherapy .

Hope both of you will have good support from your families.