HPV persisting/toxic ex

Hi everyone, I’m not sure if this is the right forum to post in. I had my first screening 2019 as I hadn’t been sexually active until 2018. I was HPV+ and called back in a year. 2020 - low grade dyskaryosis HPV+… Had a biopsy and the results were no abnormal cells… so I was put on 3 year recall??? Even though I still had HPV :sleepy: I’m confused and worried that the colposcopy team didn’t keep me coming back yearly when everyone else gets that? :pensive:

Just had my results back from my recent screening. Low grade dyskaryosis again and HPV+. So I’ve had it for 5 years now.

I know the last few years have been so stressful for me, I’m constantly stressed and I’ve got high cortisol, fluctuating between prediabetic snd normal, uni, new job, moving, 2 bereavements of close family…none of which I know helps the immune system.

I feel extra sad because the guy I got it from (I know who it was - my second bf, my first being both virgins in 2010 lol). This second one I’ve since learnt from friends that him pushing me off him and accusing me of “deliberately blue ballsing” him is abusive behaviour, and some was coercive, and I feel so guilty that I wasn’t strong enough to recognise any of it. And believed him about little things. So the fact I still have it is a reminder of that horrible relationship and I wish I could go back :sob::sob::sob::yawning_face:.