How’s everyone doing?

Hey lovely ladies!
So it’s 2 1/2 months since my treatment finished, can’t believe it’s been that long!!

I just wondered how you are all doing? I hope that you are all getting back to some normality.

I’m doing ok, the menopause makes me achey and stiff, it’s like being 80 over night and the hot flushes oh my goodness!! They aren’t too bad this time of year as it’s pretty cold in our house but I’m dreading summer hehe
I’m avoiding HRT and gonna try acupuncture in the new year.
Mentally I’m an internal mess most days, the unknown is a scary thing and I won’t find out if any treatment has been successful till the 31st March!

Much love to you all, I hope you all have a wonderful Christmas and are loving your best lives.
Much love Emma xxx

Hi again Emma,

Hope your trip to Japan was fun and that you managed to switch off from all things cancer (if only for a while). Oh no, menopause already. I'm not looking forward to that. I've been told it is very likely to kick in within three months of treatment finishing. I'm just 4 weeks out of treatment at the moment. My main problem at the moment is extreme fatigue. I have just posted on here to find out how long it lasted for other people. I didn't expect to feel great straight away but I didn't think it would get worse over time either. I'm seeing oncologist on the 16th December just for a general chat. I would also like to avoid HRT if possible. Did they try and push you to use HRT? I do worry about the side effects of menopause especially osteoporosis but I'm more concerned about developing a secondary cancer from the hormones. I'm 46 in January so although it is early for menopause it could be a hell of a lot earlier. Keep in touch Emma, especially if you find any magic potions to overcome menopause symptoms. laughing

Hey lovely, 

Japan was amazing thank you and I made myself forget all about cancer as best I could, there’s always this little voice in my head these days but I’m sure time will help. 

I can’t help with the fatigue I’m afraid, that’s about the only symptom I don’t have lol I do remember reading that tiredness can still be an issue for a couple of months post treatment, I guess it might be as the radiotherapy continues to work, so I hope that it does start to improve, you’ve been through a lot, just try and take it as eat as you can x 

No one has mentioned HRT to me but then my consultant isn’t the greatest communicator, I saw him 6 weeks after my treatment for a quick are you ok chat and that’s it till March, I feel a bit anxious at being thrust into the big wide world by myself but it’s better than seeing that bloody hospital for a while haha 

the up side is every time I act like a complete cow bag the hubby blames the menopause so I’ve been upgraded from nagging wife to menopausal and can’t help it :) it’s saved a few arguments. 

I hope you have a wonderful Christmas and that your extreme fatigue gets better. 

Much love to you,

emma xxx 

 

I haven't used the menopause excuse yet but I do blame chemo brain on a few things laughing Currently researching alternative treatments to HRT but who knows, in a few months I could be banging down their door asking to be put on it. Hoping to be fit to return to work at the start of January. That will be fun if it coincides with hot flushes and other symptoms. The joys of our new normal! Wishing you and yours a happy and healthy Christmas. 

X Maria

Hi girls!

I still can not wrap my mind around the whole cancer thing. I was diagnosed out of the blue by the end of august and I got pushed on the cancer train without a split second to think about it, and now I am already five weeks post treatment. Bizarre !

 Physically I am doing just fine. No bowel issues. No bladder issues. No fatigue , no signs of  menopauze yet ( exept maybe for beeing grumpy)

Mentally I feel like crap most of the time. And then whenever I feel good there's always that little voice in my mind telling me not to be happy, to feel good, because I might jinx it. Kinda feels like I am waiting for the other shoe to drop.

 

Because why would I be so lucky to get out unharmed, or even get out of this cancer hole. 

 

I  am trying my best to be positive bUt sometimes my fears get in the way.

 

Hay,

im doing ok, finished treatment in August. Having hot flushes daily but they are manageable right now. I'm really confused about HRT as I've been told my cancer isn't hormonal so not to worry? 
I have had some pretty dark moments but I'm slowly getting better. I attended the HOPE course arranged by Macmillan which I found really helpful. I've just got back from weekend in Dublin which was amazing. I've came back feeling a little more spiritual. Trying to not let cancer rule me or define me. 
Looking forward to a lovely Xmas with my family x

Hi Izzy, 

Delighted to hear you really don't have to many symptoms. Have you thought of doing any of the courses offered for free at the cancer centres? Some are short only a couple of hours and others are 6 week courses. I'm thinking of doing the short one tomorrow held at my local centre. 

X Maria

Yes, I signed up for it even before my treatment started due to the long waiting list and I an lucky to start this friday, ai'll be having counceling first to see what I need and what they can offer me. I'm not from the UK but from the Netherlands so things might be a bit different here.

Locket, glad to see you are doing better. It's one hell of a bumpy ride isn't it

Hey ladies, 

I am so glad that there is this wonderful bunch of people who make me feel so much less alone throughout this nightmare. 

Maria I am hoping that I’ll find the miracle herbal alternative to HRT but I suspect I’ll cave and be pleading for some patches before Easter lol obviously if I do find a miracle I will happily share the secret :) will you be able to have a staged return to work or extra support? Don’t over do it too quickly. 

Izzzy I’m totally right there with you, physically I got pretty lucky throughout treatment and aside from the menopausal side effects I’m ok but I’m a mess on the inside. I had a melt down at our local Christmas fair that this might be my last one. I know treatment is good etc etc but the fear and uncertainty is really hard to deal with at times. I hope you have lots of lovely plans for Christmas and that the counselling manages to ease the fears.

Locket! Lovely to hear from you, I’m glad that you’ve managed to get away and have a wondeful time, it makes such a difference. I haven’t been offered any HRT but I’m slowly getting used to some of the symptoms, I know I won’t be feeling the same way come summer! I hope you have a wonderful Christmas with your family. I’m hoping for snow :) 

Much love to you all, we will get through this, I’m hoping time will once again be a great healer and slowly all our anxieties and symptoms will ease. 

Big hugs xxx 

Hi Emma

I'm glad you are doing ok?! Hope Japan was amazing and you managed to switch off from all this for a wee bitty?

I'm nearly 15 weeks post op and back at work, sticking 2 fingers up at cancer and determined it will not control me. (I had it much easier than most though tbh). I do believe I have a level of anxiety that I didn't have before, but I'm hoping it will improve. 
Have a great Christmas everyone laughing

Lotty,

i am so glad you’re doing well. I’m good, Japan was amazing, I tried to switch off my cancer brain as best I could mainly with the help of a few beers, we’ve started planning France 2023 now :) 

great attitude as always lovely lotty, you always make me smile. I think time will deffo help us all mentally, I very much hope it does for you. Have the most wonderful Christmas and I hope there are lots of extra presents under the tree for you.

loads of love xx 

So heartened to read this post. I am 2 months post treatment and feeling so many aches and pains in the last couple of weeks which I've thought are either menopause or radiotherapy related? Seeing GP tomorrow because hospital sent a prescription for HRT and I really don't know whether to start it or not for fear of developing another cancer.

Also not due to have follow up until march and then scan a month later so am really scared that they haven't gotten rid of the cancer or that it will come back in the long waiting period (irrational I know). 

Went back to work yesterday but just doing half days to start with (I only work 3days) so will see how that goes. I went without any headcovering as I've got a thin layer of hair returned now and am having a bit of a 'bugger it' mentality after months of baldness lol. 

Trying to maintain my positive attitude that I've had throughout this ordeal but the wait is definitely hard and everyone's perception that everything is back to normal when my mind is constantly in a state of worry.

 

Hey Wendy, 

wow our stories are so very similar, thank you so much for posting. I was doing really good until maybe 7 weeks post treatment, I’m thinking of trying yoga to help with what feels like muscle tightening. 

I was so pleased to get back to work, I do 3 days in a supermarket and it was just lovely to have a bit of normality, what I hadn’t planned was popping the button off my work trousers on my first day, obviously 4 months off was not too good on my waist line :) thank goodness I only work short shifts lol  

There are days I feel like an 80 year old, and so stiff, I think it’s probably the perfect combo of menopause and radiation. I don’t know why but the waiting 6 months to be scanned drives me nuts, I have similar thoughts to you. everyone else seems to be having 3 month check ups but I guess this way we avoid the limbo some ladies have found themselves in where the radiotherapy is still working. 

I am confused by the HRT options, I think depending on the type of cancer you had depends whether you can take it or not, if you do start it please let me know if it helps with the aches and pains. 

Well done you on going without a head cover, I’m so glad your hair is growing back did you have a different chemo cocktail to cisplatin? 

I do find it hard that  people act as if my life is back to normal and don’t really understand that I may never be old normal ever again, I always try to be hopeful and positive but inside it’s very hard, I never knew I could be so irrational! On the up side cancer has made me live a lot more and stop wasting time on the stuff that doesn’t matter. 

I hope you have a wonderful Christmas, 

much love to you,

emma xxx 

 

Hi Emma

Will let you know about the HRT. I had 6 weeks of paclitaxol/carboplatin then 5 weeks of cisplatin for chemo then 25 external radiotherapy and two brachytherapy. Feels like it's taking a while for my hair to grow back but it's getting there.

Ive the same issue with my work clothes;)

Your hospital isn't ninewells in Dundee is it?!

Wendy x

Were you on the interface trial Wendy? I've asked of they had a similar trial here in the Netherlands but it wasn 't available.

I will be getting the hpv shots thought. Just for my pièce of mind.

Hi ladies, glad to see everyone is doing pretty good. My waistline has definitely grown too lol. I read it could be a symptom of menopause. The hot flashes are definitely no fun, my boyfriend has to freeze at night because I can not stand to have the heater on, but come morning it's like my temperature switches and then I start to get really cold.im confused with the whole HRT thing too, I guess in February they're going to test my hormone levels and go from there. I Definitely have stiff hips and lower back aches sometimes , so maybe hrt might help.Sometimes I feel real lonely with my emotions and feel like my family doesn't really understand, I think they thought when treatment was over and my scan came back clear I should be back to normal.it helps coming on here and knowing I'm not alone. I hope you ladies have a wonderful Christmas!