Finished treatment but feeling so despondent

Hi all, I finished my cancer treatment last September after an arduous 5 months. I have found it very hard to come to terms with how I am feeling now. My body has changed dramatically, my husband still doesn’t talk about it much , I feel unattractive to him and myself worth is really low. I’m not working at the moment either which don’t help( had to give up because of cancer) I’m really struggling to make myself feel better. I know it’s taking a toll on him

Hi Boo
Congratulations on finishing treatment. That must be a great relief. I am sorry to hear you are having a tough time with your self image and your relationship. You have suffered a trauma in being treated for cancer and your partner needs to be gentle with you.
Has he said its taking a toll on him or do you think that based on your own low self worth at the moment? It’s important to remember that our feelings, especially when we are anxious or upset are not always the ‘truth’.

I’m not sure how much traffic this Relationships part of the forum gets, I said to another poster that it might be because your have to scroll down. Perhaps you will find more people with similar experiences in the Cervical Cancer Sections. I’m sure they will be pleased to hear you are out of the woods with your treatment too x

Hi Boo1 and welcome

It might be worth getting a GP appointment; maybe you need some blood tests to rule out physiological reasons which may be contributing to how you are feeling. I was found to be vitamin B12 deficient after my treatment in 2017.

Things that helped me to come to terms with my ‘new norm’ in the early days after treatment included the various face to face services offered by cancer support centres which can be found via the following link for a page on the Macmillan website:
https://www.macmillan.org.uk/in-your-area/choose-location.html

x

I felt all over the place too but “helping myself” tiny steps at a time. First i was given Sertraline by the doctor to help with the mood boost until i get myself back into my old routine. This has helped greatly! I then felt better getting back to work as being sociable again and being in the “real world” helps boost your mood too. Stops you from overthinking when sitting at home. Maybe try and get a new job and give yourself a fresh start?
Walking with music in your ears does wonders for exercise and also mood boost. Gardening has helped me aswell as i was always too tired to walk at first. This helped me feel better physically aswell as mentally as it didn’t feel like exercise.
I think it is hard when you finish treatment as your whole identify feels like it’s changed. You have been in survival mode for so long that it’s almost as though your brain is only now starting to take in all the emotions of what you have survived through. Be kind to yourself in your head as what you are thinking others are thinking might be actually a reflection on how you are feeling about yourself. Think that’s what i was feeling anyway. I feel that by just focusing on tiny steps i am starting to get back to a contented place. Hope you do too! xx

In case you haven’t seen the announcement on 23/5/24, Jo’s cervical cancer trust, including the forum, is closing with immediate effect on 23 May 2024.

There is a petition to keep it open. Please sign and share the petition with everyone you can.

https://www.change.org/p/save-jo-s-cervical-cancer-trust-charity-from-closure?source_location=tag_

A forum member has set up a Reddit so we can keep in touch and still ask questions and share information.

https://www.reddit.com/r/CervicalSupport

There’s also a Facebook page set up but that won’t be anonymous which was this good thing about this forum.

https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61559971923768

It’s unbelievable that the trustees allowed the charity to get into such financial difficulties that they are making a “formal appointment of liquidators” to quote from the post on jostrust.org.uk and have shut the charity down with no notice.

I’ve found the forum invaluable. Where else can we go for the kind of information and support that we find here?

What will happen to all the past posts that still provide users with information and comfort? Will all that be lost?

I’ve posted to X and LinkedIn. Most people on there just seem to be saying “oh I’m so sad it’s closing”. We need to fight for the forum to be hosted by another charity. Surely that wouldn’t cost too much and there could be a fundraising campaign to pay for it?

Can everyone who reads this please post in socials too. We might find a wealthy charity or individual who might be able to help? :pray::heart: