Feeling even more confused and worried after colposcopy!

So I went for my colposcopy today, following "high grade dyskaryosis". The doctor was very brief with the chat, all he did was check my details and  tell me I'd have a biopsy (did see on my notes it was only moderate dyskaryosis which was comforting). I asked why he wouldn't treat me as I have been suffering anxiety over this and he said as I was young he wanted to make sure I needed treatment. Not particularly happy about that but oh well. So I hopped up and he got on with it, the speculum felt big but didn't hurt, just felt like he had to push hard to get it in. Once that was sorted I looked at the screen, what worried me is it didn't look like all the healthy cervix pictures online... It looked messy, with no defined hole, with some red blotches and some yellowy white areas :/ he told me he was going to give me a local anaesthetic which was a quick shock but nothing horrendous. I didn't have any effects from it and I kept waiting for it to kick in... They put a sticky pad on my leg and I was like 'wait, you're doing a lletz? "and the nurse said no, it's a biopsy but they use the same method as a lletz... Which worried me as I've never heard of that. So anyway I was freaking out saying could they wait for the anesthetic to kick and cos I might not be numb and the doctor said  "well. I've done it so you're OK!"  it was so quick! I saw the piece of biopsy and it was about the size of a piece of sweetcorn... Maybe smaller. I asked why they didn't do a punch biopsy and he said it's so they get a big enough piece for testing. 


So I asked what he thought and he said I'd probably need treatment, and it looked like pre cancer. I'm just devastated he didn't treat me there and then (it's a see and treat clinic and they practically did a lletz anyway!) Why leave it?! Which is why I'm now convinced the reason is because it's something more sinister. I have to wait 3 weeks for my results now :(

Hi Littlecat.

Sounds to me like you have a really super team where you are. They don't over-treat, they do stuff in such a calm way that you hardly notice it happening, I wish we were all that lucky!

Please don't jump the gun and presume that what you have absolutely must be sinister, not a bit of it. Can you try convincing yourself that it's really nothing to worry about?

Be lucky


Thanks :) 

I keep telling myself to trust what he did. He is  the top specialist consultant in the team where I went so I'm sure he was doing the right thing... I just keep worrying he was hiding stuff from me so as not to worry me! Hopefully it'll just be moderate cells and I'll get lletz and itll all be fine! 

Let's hope so, he sounds lovely!