Feel can't cope anymore

I feel really down and terrified. I have been bleeding heavily after sex and in between periods for nearly 2years now…I bleed like I’ve been stabbed, have severe stomach cramps and am at the point where I sit and cry when it happens. It’s affecting my life big time and I feel sore and disgusting and unattractive and very alone with no one who understands. I bleed like I’ve been stabbed sometimes.
I have lost all trust in Drs after countless examinations, unable to process smear tests, numerous pill changes, coming totally off the pill, ultrasounds showing nothing etc. i went to a colposcopy which I had to stop the test as I was in so much pain and so mortified feeling like I’d bleed in front of all these people they had in room…supposedly to make me feel better as the nurse said, I felt so embarrassed and traumatised and got told off like a naughty school girl by the nurse. I’ve now been referred back to colposcopy and feel physically sick and can’t sleep…I’m terrified of result, the biopsy as i watched it on YouTube and read horror stories on Internet and am so embarrassed I’ll bleed everywhere and hate how many people they have in room (last time I went there were 4) I feel like I can’t talk to them about it as last time they made me feel stupid for feeling like this.
I’ve begged Dr to put in coil and the Dr feels this is what I need but won’t do it until have colposcopy just in case but says is certain it’s hormonal so why can’t they just put coil in without colposcopy and putting me through more unnecessary tests, I just want bleeding to stop and feel like I’m banging my head against the wall and just keep having pointless tests. I have been 35 times back and forth to Drs, ultrasounds, smear tests, examinations, pill changes, gynaecologists who refer me to someone higher etc. I can’t take the bleeding anymore and am terrified of the biopsy and always suffer Utis and soap triggers one let alone vinegar solution. I am terrified about the result as well and feel stupid feeling so scared and embarrassed and have no one to talk about it who understands how I feel.

Hey dont worry ive had exactly the same. Ask for general anasethic takes all the stress away hun. Im cin3 with mine which my gp misdiagnosed for 6 months by the time they operate it will be 9 months..go to the head of your hospital and your local ccg (clinical care group) untill your voice is heard. I too am very scared and my consultant has been a pig and treated me like scum sometimes. You will be fine it may be infection or even endemetrious if u need a chat drop me a message. I have found the whole thing very intrusive and frightening. Good luck xxx

oh Millie, I am so sorry you're going through all of this. I think the dr is right to of refered you for a colposcopy. They can't risk over looking anything more sinister than hormonals.

i had my colposcopy on the 2nd day of my period. I tried to reschedule but they said it didn't matter. I felt extremely embarrassed about dripping all over the floor but i was there for a reason and decided to hold my head high and get on with it. All the staff were lovely and had obviously seen it all before. I was in and out in about 15 minutes.

i really hope it all gets sorted for you soon. Sending you lots of luck & hugs. X 

Please don't Google and watch videos, it will make anxiety worse. I had a cervical biopsy 4 years ago and 2 biopsies a couple of months ago and honestly I didn't feel a thing. The dr had me cough each time ahe took a biopsy.  

I had 2 dr's and a nurse in with me, it's to make sure  nothing is missed. Basically, the more eye's watching, less chance of missing anything.  Don't worry about the bleeding in front of the Dr's, it's their job and see it all the time