Hi all, not sure this is the right section but here goes.
This year has been horrendous in my eyes. January smear came back borderline changes, went for punch biopsy turns out CIN3 and CGIN so not borderline. I've had 2 LLETZ treatments and waiting on results for the 2nd. During this time I've also had a beignine cyst removed from my breast, my promotion basically scrapped due to company restructure and my daughter in counciling due to behavioural issues. Also issues as a 'blended family'. So it's been a lot. Now every time I speak to my step mum or step sister (one of) they make out that it's not a big deal at all, they've had it and such a body has had it. Also keep telling me that I should have baths even though I've been advised by Colps nurse not too until I'm healed. It's frustrating! My Mum and Dad both passed away (my Dad from a very aggressive cancer) and I just feel I can't talk to them at all, I told them because I had to, I almost wish I hadn't mentioned it. My partner is awesome but he struggles not being a woman and not understanding the pain and healing process and also just not feeling womanly. I've basically just had a 6cm lump out of my breast and half of not all of my cervix taken so as supportive as he is he just doesn't get it. I feel my frustration and bad mood passing onto him. I keep saying it is what it is and we'll just deal with whatever comes but at the moment I could just burst into tears. Not all the time but tonight after seeing my step mum and her bringing it up again I just can't even deal. Did anyone else have this type of thing from family?
Hi kjays21
i can sort of relate. I have my first Lletz treatment this coming Monday. But I have had HPV for 4 years and abnormal cells for the past year. Until I had my biopsy 3 weeks ago I didn't really pay much attention to my abnormal cells. Then I was given my results of CIN3 and felt as though my world had come crashing down.
I too have tried to talk to family, but i don't have parents either so it's just my partner and sister that I'm close too. My partner does what he can to support me, like you, my mood gets taken the wrong way and takes a tole on our relationship then. I'm dragging him down but really I need him to lift me up.
as for my sister, it's like she doesn't get it, or understand it. Which is why i turned to this page. Women here get it. They have been through it or are going through it. So find support and guidance here.
we are all here for one another. I guess a good sit down and serious conversation one evening may be what it takes. They may just need further education in this area like we all do. They too are able to seek support on helping friends and family go through this.
take care and keep your chin up, you got this!
xx
Hi Chloe thank you so much for your reply. Me and step mum have had a turbulent relationship over the years so since my Dad passed it's been a lot of biting my tongue and just letting it go as I no longer have the energy and it's fruitless to give it any discussion. We've talked since and I've sent her the info leaflet I was given which seems to have pacified her.
My OH has been really great actually after step mum saga, she actually said "I think it's time you had another" whilst I was feeding my baby niece which just shook me, I think I was more angered by that as my fertility isn't great and I was lucky to have my daughter, I have 2 step kids too and we don't plan for another which she knows. I think he saw how much that hurt me and I just told him exactly how I'm feeling right now, he's been really attentive which is great and asked if there's anything more he could do to support me.
Best of luck with your LLETZ, it isn't as scary as it sounds xx
