im new here so just wanted to get some friendly advice and reassurance I guess.
i had my first LLETZ in March as my smear came back with high HPV and abnormal cells! The biopsy they removed the doctors told me they think there was a tiny suspicious spec of what they thought was cancer but they are not sure but now are telling me they think it's just CGIN? (It's very confusing and anxiety provoking. I had another LLETZ again yesterday because the suspicious spec they did find was so close to my margins they wanted to cut all around to make sure they definitely have "got it all" and avoid skip lesions I think they called it? It's all been very overwhelming and finding it difficult to process it all.
Sorry, I thought I'd give a bit of a back story first - so I've started recently dating this wonderful guy and I was told after the first Lletz we had to use condoms for the first 3 months but now I've had the 2nd, they have told me to use them till I have my next smear test to see if the I test negative for HPV.
im just a little bit overwhelmed with this and what it means to the new relationship. We would both after awhile, would like to not use condoms (i am on the pill and I was with my last partner for 9 years and he has not had many sexual partners). But I guess I'm overthinking "what if I give him my HPV and he gives it back to me?" And I've already had two LLETZ?
He says he doesn't mind using condoms and is very supportive but it doesn't make me feel better when he says things like "I can't feel you as well with one on" so I feel I am disappointing him? But I know this is all my negative thinking and he has not said any of this to me outwardly.
I guess I probably need you lovely people to slap me here and say "you have enough to worry about right now" but I guess I just wanted to see if anyone has or is in a similar situation and how they dealt with it all?
much love to you all xxx