Colposcopy tomorrow...so scared

Hi

Following my cervical screening smear test on 4th March 2021, I received a letter to say I was HPV+ and had cell changes - which my Dr confirmed as Borderline changes.  

I have been in a very dark and anxious state of mind since receiving this letter as all smear tests have been normal until now (I'm 45, married with 2 teens).  Learning i have HPV was a huge shock to me, and then abnormal cells too....my head was swimming with worries and questions.

Me being me....I went straight to Dr Google, and have continued to do so for weeks cry  I've read a lot of women have had Borderline cell changes but after their Colposcopy, it was discovered CIN3.  

I'm so nervous for tomorrow, I can barely think straight.  I've had a number of gynae problems in the past with very painful and heavy periods, ruptured ovarian cyst, and now this.  I have no idea what to expect or if they'll give me a procedure straight away?  If they do, will i be in much pain?  I haven't told my girls i'm going for this appointment as i don't want to scare them or discuss it with them until i have more info.

I should also mention i came off the mini pill when i came to the end of my pack around 10 days ago, and all the gynae pains have re-appeared.  I feel like someone is squeezing and pulling at my ovaries and uterus.  I was given a scan and biopsy for these pains last year but nothing was found, although endometreosis was mentioned a couple of times....but that was it.

Apologies if i'm rambling, all my thoughts are spilling out as i type.  I wonder if anyone would have any information/experience they would share with me?  I feel a sleepless night coming on.

Thanks in advance for your support and time,

Jo x

Hi Jo,

I'm a tiny bit younger that you, and also had a smear on 1st March that resulted in an HPV+ and borderline result. Had my colposcopy 6 weeks later, and the biopsy showed CIN2 (I would say that I was quite unlucky - 88% of women referred with a borderline result will be found to have CIN1 or less according to reports from the screening programme in previous years https://digital.nhs.uk/data-and-information/publications/statistical/cervical-screening-annual/england---2019-20/cervical-cytology#outcome-of-colposcopy-referrals). So, back to the hospital today for LLTEZ, which wasn't the most fun I've ever had on a Monday morning but is very do-able. Now cuddling a hot water bottle as it feels like bad period pains, and taking full advantage of the advice to rest for today.

Whether you have LLETZ right away if it's offered is entirely up to you - personally I'd have insisted on a biopsy first given that my smear result was borderline. I completely get the anxiety around the uncertainty of it all - I haven't slept properly for weeks. It's only now that the procedure is done that I'm feeling the worry lifting.

I told my daughter when I was going for the colposcopy and biopsy as someone else had to collect her from school so she's clearly younger than your girls, and today I told her that the tests had shown I needed some treatment so I was going back for that today. She's accepted that without asking any more questions (though I'd happily answer any questions she asked, particularly as she'll be getting the HPV vaccine at school in a few years).

You've got this - I wish I could tell my yesterday self what my today self knows as honestly, I worried way more than was useful.

Hi Jo

I had my colposcopy about 3 weeks ago now and I can honestly say to you it was absolutely fine.  I felt no pain whatsoever at the time, literally felt nothing, and that was with taking 3 biopsies.   I actually found the smear test itself more uncomfortable.  Had some mild period pain discomfort for a couple of hours afterwards, didnt even need to take painkillers.  Then for the following few days I had some brown-ish discharge which they advised me about, thats just the fluid they use to view the cells I believe

I also had a nurse with me chatting all the time as well which I think probably helped.  I reckon it took no longer than 10 minutes, then I got dressed and got outta there

I hope you get on ok x

Hi Akaytee

Thanks so much for taking time out to respond and reassure me, especially so soon after today's procedure. I hope you're feeling OK, and quite right...make the most of the rest - not just from the physical pain but also from the emotional side because worrying is exhausting isn't it? I feel the same as you, I haven't slept for weeks and it's weighing heavy on my mind.

I'll talk to my girls tomorrow once I've been for my colposcopy and I have more info. I won't make a big deal of things, I'll say to them that I didn't want them to worry. They're 15 and 19, and I know my eldest especially will worry. 

As much as I'm not looking forward to the colposcopy, I can handle it and any pain that may come along along it, what worries me is what they're going to find....the emotional side of things,and worrying it turns out to be much worse than they first anticipated.

Thanks again for your advice and reassurance, it really has helped me.

Rest up laughing

 

Jo x

Hi Laura

Thanks so much for taking the time to respond to me, and to give me a bit more of an indication of what to expect tomorrow. I keep telling myself I can handle the physical side of it but I worry they're going to find that things are worse than they first thought. I'm a worrier by nature frown

At least its in the morning and I won't have all day to wait.

Thanks again x

I had borderline cells at smear and cin 2 too at biopsy also.

Due Lletz next Monday. 

I'm not really worried about the procedure, it's the emotional side of things. I suppose there's such uncertainty. 

88 percent makes us quite unlucky. I suppose we are already in the small percentage who have changes in the first place. Kind of don't want to be in the small percentage who also have HPV after Lletz. Though I looked up some research which seemed to be more positive about upgraded borderline smears.

in reality there's very little I can do

Hi everyone

I just wanted to write a wee note to say I had my colposcopy this morning, and it all went very smoothly with no pain at all, just slight discomfort which passed when i relaxed a bit. 

I got a bit emotional during the consultation, but the Dr was very understanding and took the time to explain things to me.  At first it looked like i might not need a biopsy as the Dr couldn't find any cell changes - but after some more checking (took a while for them to appear) a few cells were found.  I had 2 biopsies, which weren't painful, felt like a very quick bite lol. Results expected within 6-8 weeks.  

I feel much more relaxed now the first procedure is over and the ball is rolling.  I still have some slight anxiety over the biopsy results but i'm sure that whatever they are, I'll find a way to deal with it.

For anyone who has a colposcopy coming up - nobody was more worked up than i was, but the procedure wasn't nearly as bad as i thought it would be. Thank you to those of you who took the time out to reassure and support me. xx

Just wondering how you got on with your results?