I feel a fool posting this but those who have read my earlier thread will know why, and i feel safe asking these questions here, so apologies if you think Im being foolish.
my biggest fear around having my colposcopy exam is not necessarily the procedure it actually getting into the correct position to endure the procedure. I have been told that I will strip from the waist down then I'll sit in a special chair with stirrups and the chair will be tipped back so Im flat on my back - legs up.
I have huge probklems with this....my heart is thumping away now....
If this is TMI click off now......I was raped by a male "friend"..... I was sitting on the arm of the chair chatting to him when he advanced towards me and tipped me back so I was lying on the settee with my legs up.....the rest is history as they say and details are not needed. I have only ever had one flash back from this tipped back experience and that was on a fairground ride......I freaked, completely and utterly freaked. When going to the detist the chair is already tipped back if you like before I lie down...I cant sit there and be lowered down. My dentist knows this.
Please could you tell me how you were positioned for your colposcopy? Im driving my self insane with worry.... Are your legs strapped to the stirrups? Can I get away if I want too?
I feel dreadful most of the time averaging about three hours sleep at night, constanntly bursting into floods of tears and I feel a mess despite having diazepam from the dr. I work as a secondary school teacher...nothing phases me...even the dreaded OFSTED! How come Im falling apart over this???
Ive read through some amazing threads on this site and I think you women here are amazingly strong considering how much you have been through...I guess thats why I feel its lame posting something like this, however youd be helping me out more than you'll ever know x