Cervical Lesions

I have a history of non-invasive cervical cancer when I was 24. Move ahead to 49 years old and during a pelvic exam, my doctor found a “lesion” on my cervix that was easily viewed without colposcopy, microscope. I asked what it was and my doctor said that it did not look like regular benign polyps and needs to be removed. She looked another 3 times and the look on her face had changed from when she began my exam (which may just be me reading into it too much, but she did state that it didn’t resemble a typical benign poly and was irregular in shape.

I’m freaking out a little because the first time I had cancer, it was not visible by the eye, it was only the pap test and colposcopy that revealed the growth. I am waiting for a small biopsy and to be referred to a gynecologist for colposcopy and additional biopsy. Perhaps I’m freaking out more because of my history, but I feel like my head’s spinning out of control and there’s nothing I can do for myself other than wait.

Has anyone else gone through this and how did it go for you and how did you manage the anxiety of waiting for appointments/plan while feeling so helpless yet wanting to address the issue brought to your attention.