brachy and men!!!

Im drawing near the end of my treatment, brachytherapy certainly wasnt as bad as i expected so thank you so much for all your reassuring posts. However Im having some relationship trouble, if this isnt where this post should be feel free to delete and give me into trouble. I had the brachytherapy Thursday and Friday of this week I came home last night and had awee night to myself just chilling out. I have radiation cysitus and its driving me mad, so went to pick up said mr after finally getting the courage to get ready, I was really unvomfortable in the car ecause of the cystitus and naturally very quiet.t


Since then hes been in the house but hardly spoke two words to me while I clean do washing etc, offered him dinner i made he refused it, offered a cuppa he refused it. Now im in my bed when I said I was going i said i dont want to sit in silence, i got well talk then. Is it me? or would it be really that diffcult for him to make an effort today of all days? Im not asking for much but if im quiet then two wrongs dont make a right.


Sorry for the rant jut so frustrated, like he doesnt even try to understand how I feel in general never mind the day after radio therapy. Its like a vicious circle.


Charlene xx

Oh matey,

Its not u. Im sure most women on here will agree sometimes men just don't understand. Im lucky enough to have  a great bloke but even he wasn't there with me sometimes. Especially when I was tired and didn't want to talk to him but go to bed. A lot of men just don't think, can only think from their point of view and need us to explain exactly what's going on. But then women can be the same, im not calling all men!!! Don't get me wrong!! 


Im not explaining myself very well... just to say most of us will have been where u are. See how he is in the morning. I hope u have a better sunday xxx

Hugs to u x

Hi Charlene,

So sorry to hear this is happening to you on top of everything else. Some women describe their man as a "rock". Mine is just a hard place!

Wishing you all the very best with this new and exciting phase in your journey :-/ and hope it gets resolved quickly and happily.

Lots of love



Hi Charlene

Well done for getting through your brachy.
Sending you a big hug, it’s so tough sometimes.
My other half was, luckily fab, but as Dons says he had his moments! And do you know what? He was scared, even more so than me I think. Scared of what would happen to me, and our family. So his way of dealing with it was to pretend everything was ok and normal. And I did the same, because I wanted to be strong so I rarely told him how I felt, that sometimes I was so afraid I felt it would actually choke me. So we both carried on as normal! This never really came out until last year, when I got a misdiagnosis that it was back. Then we really talked and it all made sense.
I’m not saying this is the case for you guys obviously but I hope you get it sorted soon. You need to focus on yourself and getting better.

Take lots of care
Ali xx

Very well said Ali

A cancer diagnosis leaves all sorts of unspoken things in dark corners. Even when you believe you have sailed through it and are happily out the other side a spot of conselling never goes amiss. Blokes are terrified of losing us but are expected to be big and brave and strong. Bottling up these emotions can send them really weird!

Lots of love