Hi there! I’m new here, I’ve been extremely nervous/scared ever since my smear two months ago, and I’m just looking for some advise really after having my colposcopy - I hope that’s ok. I understand that a lot of women are going through worse on this forum, so I hope this doesn’t sound petty, but I’m just terrified out of my mind!
I had my first ever smear (aged 24.5) at the start of January 2017, which came back as Borderline changes and HPV Positive. I received an appointment for 30th March, so I counted down the days - hoping that I could get my questions answered when I went for my colposcopy. From what I’ve read, a lot of the consultants are very informative, and some of the women can even look at the image of their cervix on the screen. My colposcopy was the first chance I’ve had to speak to an actual person about this (as opposed to letters) and so I had lots of questions to ask as you can imagine.
Well my appointment was very rushed. All I know is that she took 3 biopsies (Is that bad?!) and that she said that my cervix appeared to be ‘in line with the results of my smear’ - so in other words, borderline. (Borderline what?) I didn’t get to see my cervix on the screen, so I’m not sure how it looked (she didn’t really tell me). I then got changed and assumed I would be given an opportunity to ask questions. I asked what CIN grade I appeared to be, to which she replied “CIN is pre-cancer. That’s what the biopsy is for.” I have to wait 4 weeks for the results so it would be nice to get an idea of where I stand. I felt as though she was in a rush to get the next patient in - she was even stood up walking out the door whilst I was asking questions. I finally asked her what will happen next, and she just said “we can’t say until we get the results of the biopsy, that will determine what happens next.” She then left me in the room with the poor nurse who was trying to comfort me, and I burst into tears. Sorry if that sounds dramatic, I was just hoping to get some answers after waiting for 2 months - at least an idea of what I have and what this means. Overall it was an awful experience. I’m not sure why she didn’t want to tell me anything - do you think she is worried it might be cancer and she didn’t want to worry me? And if she told me it appears to be borderline, is that a good thing?
Is borderline pre-cancer? And if she thought it was borderline, could she also think I have cancer?
I’m sorry if this is so long, I would really appreciate some insight if anyone can help, as I’m very confused right now. Similarly I’m happy to help anyone with support (though I’m clearly new to this!)