Hello - I'm a newbie and I have just been exploring the site and forum a bit.
I feel I am being a bit rude in just starting a new thread without ever having contributed, but I am very new to all this! I do apologise if it is poor forum etiquette!
iI had my first smear at the age of 26 which came back normal, no abnormalitys detected. I have just had my second aged 30 and it has come back as showing borderline changes with evidence of high-risk HPV infection. I know it's not the end of the world, and actually quite common, but I still feel quite unhappy. It's the HPV more than anything, as I know that is much riskier than just having borderline/mild changes. It's hard not to feel anxious.
My main anxiety is actually about the colposcopy itself because I am so squeamish and so anxious when it comes to medical things. EVen going into a hospital to accompany someone else has me feeling faint and sick. My smear was done by a lovely, thoughtful nurse but I was still very panicky even though on a rational level I had no problem with the smear happening: I was not afraid, as such. After it was done I had to lie back down because I was close to fainting or vomiting which in themselves make me very scared.
I only got my referral letter (not an actual appointment letter) last week and I think its sensible for me to go to a GP to discuss my worries. I am just highly unsure about whether I can actually get through a colposcopy without being sedated or something. The speculum feels awful to me but I thnk I could cope with the examination. But I realise there's a high likelihood of biopsies, and then a fairly high chance of LLETZ. I'm frightened of needles and blood and just about everything so I really don't see how I'm going to get through it! Having said that I am very grateful for the NHS doing this for me. I know I'm being a total wimp compared to most people but I was wondering if anyone had experience of being highly squeamish/anxious/sedated?!
Thank you so much for reading. I know its a very jumbled post but my mind is not at it's clearest right now...
P.S. I have never had any medical or dental procedures before (as you might have guessed!)