I just wanted to update you with some good news, I am 2 weeks on from my keyhole radical hysterectomy and have been given the all clear at last! Physically I’m healing well and looking forward to getting back to full health.
Mentally though I have to say it took me a while to get my head round the fact that surgery really was the best way forward when scans came back clear I had had LLETZ treatment which had probably removed everything anyway. I actually felt really angry for a while because I couldn’t understand why me and my family were being put through this massive upheaval for what I perceived to be nothing - why couldn’t I just go back for a smear in 6 months??? Anyway, I now understand and I’m so much clearer as to why surgery was my best option. I’m so lucky to have a fantastic consultant/surgeon and specialist nurse who answered all my questions.
Even though I’ve always maintained a positive outlook and haven’t thought for 1 minute that I wouldn’t get through this but…if I think about things too much though I feel completely floored by the enormity of what I just come through…I’m a full time mum and have 2 small children and I truly feel that I’m one of the lucky ones but often still feel such a rollercoaster of emotions. My husband is really laid back and is great at the practical things but not so good with the emotional side - however I think that’s just men in general! Even though I have received amazing support from friends and family I feel like I’m constantly having to stay strong and put up a happy front for everyone…maybe I’m sounding ungrateful, I don’t mean to but I guess these feelings are natural…
Thanks for all your support ladies and stay positive, ask your questions & don’t let docs fob you off, you know your body better than anyone.
Hey Heidi, that’s great news, congratulations and thank you for sharing!
While it must be great to be finally given the all clear, I think we still are allowed to grieve for what we’ve lost and to rail against the unfairness of it all. It’s healthy to let it out.
Whatever the outcome, it certainly is a wild ride emotionally going through all of this and I think most of us feel under pressure to project a certain way of being, even (or perhaps most of all) to our nearest and dearest.
I think it might be worth trying to find a safe space to talk about how you feel. My nurse said that the she could help me access cousnelling if I wanted it and altough I don’t feel the need yet, I can imagine I might take her up on it later. I also joined my local Jo’s support group where you can really say anything you want to other people who know exactly what it’s like to go through this.
Whatever happens, I wish you all the best going forward. x
Thanks Rosehip for your support.
You're right about being feeling the need to talk about it. I have made a point in contacting Jo's re a support group in my area and I'm waiting for the team leader to get in touch so I feel I've made a first step at least. I know there is also a local Macmillan support group at my local library too.
How are things with you? I hope you are coming to terms with your own situation and hope you have good support round you.