Hi all
I’m back home from hospital since my hyestercomy on Monday. Feeling very weak emotionally, quite fragile and just not myself. Physically, I’m surprised how well I’m doing but as I say, emotionally I’m really lacking in my usual confidence. My whole expereience so far hasn’t been great. I felt very under-supported at the hospital - I didn’t see the same person twice and I was very overwhelemed when I arrived on the ward last weekend to find that everyone there was at least 80 years old. I had assumed that there would be a real mix of ages, but I was by far the youngest (I’m 39) and it really hit home how young I am to have this happen to me (although I appreciate very much from this forum that there are other out there much younger). Some of the medical staff were quite pleasant but I felt I was on a conveyor belt of ladies having a hysterectomy and they just wanted you up and out asap.
Anyway, I’m home now and feel overwhelmed, emotional, weepy and weird. It would be really nice to talk to someone at the same stage of treatment as me. I don’t know anyone else who’s going through this.
Sarah
Hi Sarah,
So sorry to hear that you had such a rotten time in hospital. I still have my surgery to come but I think feeling ‘weepy and weird’ is only to be expected after all you’ve been through. I am sure it’s a normal part of processing what would be a traumatic experience under any circumstances, but particularly when you haven’t been handled with the sensitivity you are entitled to expect. Give yourself time and you’ll come back to yourself.
My specialist nurse told me that some women feel the impact of hormonal changes very quickly after hysterectomy so if you’ve had your ovaries removed and you continue to feel very emotional, then it might be worth getting that checked out. No reason to suffer unnecessarily.
I’m sure other women who have been through this will have good advice for you. In the meantime, be kind to yourself and give yourself time. This is tough stuff, but we are women. We are tougher! xxx
Hi Sarah,
just sending you big hugs after your op and hoping things improve and settle down soon - lots of ladies on here will be able to give you lots of support and advice, I cant necessarily but didnt want to read and run knowing you are having such a hard time
sending hugs
Andrea
Hi Sarah
I had a hysterectomy in late Sept so understand what you are going through.
It sounds like you didn’t have a good experience in hospital, which is a real shame. I too was the youngest in my ward by at least thirty years (I’m 38). The other women in my ward were all lovely but none of them were in for cancer related illness or were of a comparable age/op. I did notice an occasional younger person on the other wards when I went walkabout - it would be nice if they could consider age and type of op when deciding where to place people. I found I was often the only person awake on my ward while everyone else was asleep! It would have been good to meet people going through similar experiences but I guess the main concern of the hospital is to get us better. If you were very disappointed it might be worth feeding back your experiences to your gynae-oncology nurse. Obviously it can’t change your treatment at hospital but could improve things for someone else in future.
You’ve been through a lot and I want to reassure you what you’re feeling is completely understandable and normal :o) You have been diagnosed with cancer and just been through a major operation so I’d be really surprised if you were feeling yourself! Don’t expect too much. I have been through a whole range of emotions including numbness, anger, sadness, tears, anxiety etc since my operation. This is all fine and part of coming to terms with things and starting the recovery process. Remember the hysterectomy really takes it out of you - so you’ll be both physically and emotionally drained. Please don’t worry if your recovery takes some time and don’t hurry it - you will be fine. Take the time to fully recover, treat yourself and rest. It WILL get better soon. I’m not quite there yet but every week I have seen a big improvement. Surround yourself with positivity, good friends and family, favourite books/TV, hobbies all the things you enjoy most. I still have wobbly moments but they are getting less and less as weeks go by.
You don’t say if you had your ovaries removed but I started hot flushes and menopausal symptoms week 2 after the surgery and would recommend you start HRT soon if you may need it. My thought is there’s no point going through the menopause prematurely if you don’t have to, especially while you are recovering from major surgery but everyone is different.
You haven’t mentioned about lymph node removal. Is that something you had done in surgery and are awaiting test results? If so, you’ll no doubt be feeling emotional about that. Good luck with any results and hope you have good news.
I’m off work for one more week. If you need any advice or support please let me know. I can always send you a PM or call you for a chat.
Take care and best wishes
Kirsty xx
Hi Sarah
I am 7 weeks post op and your posting struck a cord with me as I remember feeling exactly the same when I cam home. I fully expected to be in agony from the op but for me the worst part was how I felt emotionally and feeling so vulnerable. I am still dealing with my emotions now I go from feeling an overwhelming sense of grief to feeling so angry at the whole world and every emotion in between. But I am hoping this will get easier.
My only advice is to not bottle it up and to talk, cry shout … whatever you need to do. There is no right or wrong. I also read some leaflets from Macmillan ‘the emotional effects of cancer’ and another one and these really helped me to realise what I was feeling was so normal. If you look on their website I am sure you can order them, if not, I would be so happy to send you mine if you pm me your address. I also found ringing my key worker helped as well as they were so lovely and assuring,
I found that surrounding your self with friends and family (in between resting) and going out for a walk each day (no matter how short) helped a lot.
I hope this has been of some take care and keep telling yourself it will get easier xxx
Hi Sarah
It’s not surprising you feel emotional and exhausted. A hysterectomy is major surgery. I am 4 and a half weeks post op and am doing so much better than I was in the first week. You are in the very early stages of recovery and it all takes time. You need to rest and let your body heal. A site that has helped me more than I can describe is one called hystersisters. It’s a site for women who have had hysterecomies or are going to have one. They have wonderful forums and the support and information is fantastic. There are women at all different stages of recovery and who will understand exactly how you’re feeling. It’s a US based group. but there are women from all over the world on there.
I hope you’re feeling better soon big warm hugz
Thanks so much for your comments. It’s so reassuring to know that I’m not alone and I appreciate your time x
big hugs hun, im nearly 4 months post hysterectomy and my experience was pretty similar! its the lack of sleep the increase of morphine and being just plain P****d off! it does get better and all the shouting old dears in the hospital beds are ust a distant dream (Thank god!!!). On the plus side you can only have a hysterectomy once so the worst is over with!! i wish you all the best with your treatment and recovery xxx
