3 monthly check up coming

Hi all,

Next week i have an appoinment for my second 3 monthly checkup following rh and chemoradiation.

I am very very scared ,i can not stop worrying about results. I am really worried about recurrence.

Hope all goes well for all of us 

 

Hey there Idyll, 

What you are describing & feeling is perfectly understandable, reasonable and normal. Which is just as well really, because I've been through the post treatment screening cycle three times now and am now waiting for my next check up in January (which will be the year anniversary of the end of ny treatment) and I still go through the feelings you are describing. After January I have, what I'm pretty sure will be the excruciating wait for my annual MRI scan & results in April. (For me, that's the biggie!) 

I don't think there's easy solutions to this, other than that it does get easier but it never goes away. 

Things that have helped me:

If I catch myself looking up too many case studies/ stories about cervical cancer/recurrence treatments in a self referring negative way, I force myself to stop doing that for the rest of that week. Reading any more about it isn't going to change anything for me in that week, and a week feels like a doable restriction. This especially matters if it eats into time I had planned to be spending doing something else. In the early days after the end of my treatment, this happened a lot. I also included Jos Trust Forum visits in this rule. Most of the time I've found it amazingly helpful, but in my darker moments I've found I can 'misuse' it to 'feed' my anxieties and so stepping back from it for a short while can be a healthy choice for me.

You have to sort of remind yourself that there's a whole world of people, places & things out there, that when you were diagnosed you were worried you might not see or experience for much longer, and now here you are - the other side of the treatment with some catching up to do!  If you've genuinely got time to waste on the internet, why not look for puppies or kittens instead - they'll make you smile - which is already an improvement! Seriously though, write yourself a 'bonus time bucket list' of things you'll do more of because you love them, ways of spending time doing things you love with the people you love. then when the 'recurrence rumbles' pop into your head try and see them off by doing one of them or going for a walk in the fresh air for ten minutes to plan how to make one of them happen. 

Its never easy, I do appreciate that.

But it does get easier, THAT I know.

Hi cheery1,

Thank you for your reply :))

I am trying to keep myself busy but monkey mind never calms down. I have so many thoughts starting with what if ..... in my mind.

Meanwhile i have burning feeling and pains that comes and goes all around my abdomen which does not exist before. Hope this ends well .fingers crossed.

Hi 

I know how you feel, I have got my first mri scan since I finished my treatmen, I have got a mixture of emotions running, so I am trying to keep myself busy l gave a 6 hour shift for next3 afternoon and on Friday I have my mri scan but it’s not till 5pm so I have put myself on a morning shift and then my hubby will pick me up and then Home get changed then a 50 minutes drive to the hospital and then scan then 50 minutes Home and back to Hospital on the 17rh nov for result, you’ll be fine. Message me if you like anne xx

Hi Idyll, 

ah the waiting is horrible! I had my first 3 month results appointment last week, i kept telling myself not to worry cause i couldn't change anything but it's still there niggling away! 

I hope you've been doing ok since finishing your treatment and last appointment. 

sending lots of love and positive thoughts your way lovely xx